I spend a lot of my time in the company of others. I really enjoy conversations, sharing energy and the creative flow that discussions can take. Yet every now and again I need some quiet space. The energy, needs and ideas of others become a little too overwhelming. There is too much ‘noise’ for me to handle. It took me quite a chunk of my life to recognise that need for silence. Even to grasp the idea of silence as a positive place to be. We are such social beings that there are a lot of expectations placed on us to keep up our end of the conversation. When we retreat into silence it is often seen as something bad. As if we don’t want to share our ideas, feelings or observations so are being selfish. I have to admit that in the past when I was having a discussion one of the fastest ways to irritate me was for the other person to go silent. After all, not speaking in a conversation can be a controlling silence. Or an uncomfortable silence.
Then as a counsellor I learned to be ok with silences. I began to understand that silence might be a reflective space – a way to order one’s thoughts and work out what to say. Or even not say. Silence can be golden as it is a way of allowing us to process information. Once I became used to letting the silence have a space in conversations I found that I could observe myself and others better. I could ‘see’ the emotions and thoughts more clearly. There was a better understanding if I made room for natural pauses. In those pauses I might find a new clarity in what I wanted to say. I was also giving the other person a space in the conversation to do the same. As I turned the silences into positive contributions to the dialogue with people I also recognised my own need for silence.
In our busy lives we have little time to retreat. I love the word contemplate – something that retreat space and silence allows us to do. We can go deeper into ourselves. We can ask questions and wait for the answers to emerge. When we allow our voice to fall silent, when we remove ourselves from the voices of others and the noise of the world we give ourselves the opportunity to hear and experience the deepest of all connections. We can discover the connection to our own Spirit and through that our personal connection to Divine guidance. For a long time I closed down the voice of my Spirit and the connection to the Divine. Now I work every day with the Spirit World and the representatives of Divine love. I embrace and enjoy silence. I look for chances to spend a few moments alone and quiet, sitting waiting for a different kind of conversation to take place. Let moments of silence wrap around you every day. Be ready to listen not speak. There are important things for you to discover in the quiet.
Day 118 of my blogging challenge.