Giving birth to another dream

imageWhat a frantic few days! Church services, a Centre to run and PartyLite candles to find out about. All alongside the deadline for my first manuscript to be completed. Also how exciting! I get to do all sorts of things that I enjoy and call it work.

I’m always amazed at the way my life has shaped itself around things that I’ve finally realised I am good at. It’s like living a dream come true. When I gave birth to my daughter I though my biggest dream had finally happened. However, I’ve been lucky enough to dream more dreams. And to watch them manifest in the world. There are more dreams to birth in the next few weeks and I’m so excited yet full of butterflies at the same time.

Today one of the most personally rewarding dreams was born. Those of you who have followed my blog will know that I started all those days ago because I wanted to help myself overcome writers block. I was sure that if I stuck with a blog a day I would find enough words to make a book. Hopefully one of the ones I’ve had stuck in my head for years. Now it’s a reality. I have sent the first draft of my manuscript off to my editor. I know it’s not the finished article yet. There will be a lot of polishing to do. Yet I’m sure that at the end I will have what I wanted. My words will be out of my head to be shared with others.

I have always written this blog with two aims. One, to help me reflect on my day. I like to take my experiences and explore what they are all about. The second has been to let people see what a psychic life is like.

A psychic, or as I prefer, intuitive life is all about ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Extraordinary in the sense that not everyone is doing them yet. I’m sure that when cars first appeared people thought that their drivers were extraordinary. After all horses, feet and carts had got us all from place to place for hundreds of years. Why use a contraption to get around that was noisy, fast and dangerous? Nowadays we don’t bat an eye at all the cars on the road. Driving is seen as an ordinary thing. People do it for a job. Everyone wants to be able to do it. And most of us can.

I am certain that one day we will all use our intuition to connect with one another. It will  seem odd not to. It will be an ordinary thing. I’m also certain that one day we will all use our intuitive ability to connect directly with our loved ones in the Spirit World. There will be no need to visit a church or a medium. It will be an ordinary thing to chat with out Guides, family and friends in the Afterlife. It’s all about getting over our connection block.

Having finished my book it’s time to birth another writing dream. I’m looking forward to  another two books. They are in my head and need to be on the page. It’s also time to start manifesting the biggest dream of my mediumship so far.

I’m about to launch the Earth’s ArchAngels Mystery School. Three years of hard work, going forward then into reverse, has delivered the ArchAngel’s Wysdom Odessy online training course. It’s also brough forwards Parashiel’s Balm energy healing and waves of support from the rest of the ArchAngels. Now it’s time to teach their mysteries. Students have been coming forward one by one to take up the opportunity to immerse themselves in ancient knowledge. Soon I’m off to visit the Dragon Tree on Tenerife to pick up another set of energy vibrations for the school.

The Seekers and Custodians who join the Mystery School are the people who will help to birth that acceptance of intuition. They are the designers of our next model of working with Energy Beings. They are like the drivers of the first cars. People who like to develop, test and push the boundaries of what we think can be done. I know it’s going to be an exciting, challenging time. It’s also going to be frustrating, irritating and hard to wait for this vision of Earth to finally manifest. My Guides tell me I will see it happen whilst I’m alive. How wonderful that will be.

Please dream your dreams. Make them extraordinary. Believe in them, in yourself and in the support around you. Stick at it. Keep sticking at it. Your life can change so that you give birth to your dream too. I know it can ?

Day 280 of my blogging challenge. 

 

Back to the Beginning

images-49Sometimes we think we are going forward. Suddenly we turn around and find we are back at the beginning. It seems as if all of our efforts have put us back exactly where we started. At this point it’s hard not to get discouraged. I often ask myself ‘What’s the point?’ when I feel like I’ve been bounced back to a scene from earlier in my life. Like in Monopoly when you chase around the board trying to stay out of jail or find an elusive get out of jail for free card. Every circuit of the board is effectively a new beginning, a set of fresh choices and an opportunity to make more mistakes. All governed by the random chance of the throw of a dice.

Yet somewhere along the line there has been progress. Foundations have been built and work is underway even if it’s below the surface or well out of sight. You might even ‘own’ something and have the resources to build more success. Returning to the beginning is an opportunity to see if the direction I am taking is the best one, or to brush up on things I have become complacent about or even a way to reconsider what I want from myself and life. I find it easy to brush aside my successes – most of us do. Going back to the beginning reminds me that there are things I’ve achieved, perhaps even when I didn’t think I could. It will soon be the second anniversary of the opening of my Down 2 Earth Heart Centre, three years since I returned to working in Hebden Bridge and ten years since I did my first public mediumship (a trance experience with Jean Duncan that I will always be grateful for).

When I decided to follow the prompts of my Guides ten years ago I’m not sure I realised how much mediumship would mean to me or its impact on my life. Through every frustrating, challenging and joyful moment of my development so far I can say that I have been following my life’s purpose and passion. I love working with Energy Beings so that I can be of service to others. I love that my lovely friend Maura gave me the title of ‘down to earth’ in an inspired moment. There have been so many moments when I knew that a heart had been made easier by what I could offer. Yet I have been back to the beginning time and again. When my Guides have swapped over and I have to learn a different way of working with the new one. When I’ve got stuck with confused energies, or Spirits who don’t want to talk, or been overcome by the emotions of someone’s personal situation. Each time I’ve had to remind myself how it all works for me, how to get it to hang together and how to do the best I can then let it go.

Returning to work in Hebden Bridge has been an experience too. For many years I did my counselling here (along with part-time barmaiding, playgrouping & NCT work) before discovering my connections with the Spirit World. A lot of my early mediumship teaching was done here too. Then came a gap when I worked out of the area. Coming back three years ago was definitely back to the beginning. This is where I started my self-employment in 1998, where I shared adventures with other small business people and from where I explored a vast range of spiritual opportunities. Some of the people I knew in that 1998 beginning have moved on, a few are still here and many more people are in the town offering a diversity of spiritual thought and practice. It’s an interesting mix. Being somewhat of a hermit type I have enjoyed reconnecting, rediscovering and refreshing my connections with people. I’ve also realised how much I have changed for the better. I recognise my strength of purpose has developed alongside my certainty of the existence of my connection to Energy Beings. I am prepared to say it how it is for me and to respect that others may not see it the same way. I have energy and commitment. I am always ready to learn more. No matter what the challenge I have stickability.

So next moth when I celebrate the second anniversary of my Centre I will be back at the beginning once again. Plans are underway for more improvements to the rooms, more activities are in the pipeline and the doors will be open more frequently for our third year. There are success stories from the people who have used the Centre that lift my heart. I have seen people come in weighed down, uncertain, confused and unsure of where they are going. I see those people now and they have made it past their return to the beginning. They have seized the chance to work it all out in a safe and supportive place. They have created brand new beginnings and got on with it. This journey isn’t without challenge. I have asked myself ‘what’s the point’ many times. My Guides have always been there reminding me that I can often see further than others. I can see the Spirit in someone fighting to shine through the ups and downs of life. I may not be able to help that Spirit today, tomorrow or any time soon but I’m in the right place to do so when the human being is ready to accept help. Not because I believe I’m some kind of saviour or that I have to rescue people, but because we signed a contract in the Spirit World, long before we came together down here, to be of assistance to one another. I believe that what you give out you get back. The help I can give will be returned to me when I am ready to accept it too.

Going back to the beginning is at the heart of making progress in our spiritual evolution. It’s the reason we choose to have many lives. It’s the opportunity to change direction. The opportunity to see how strong our Spirit truly is. So next time you find yourself back at the beginning, wondering why all the old feelings, thoughts and situations are apparently still around you, take a few moments to remember life is a sequence of beginnings. There is a fresh opportunity to change your choices, change your mind, change your outcomes. Pass go, collect your £200 and spend your resources wisely in building on what you already have as a solid foundation.

Day 106 of my blogging challenge.

Trance Tripping

imageToday I’ve been on a trance trip ? I’ve been back to my home town of Oldham to the Spiritualist church to teach trance mediumship. It was lovely to help people discover their ability to make a deeper blend with a Spirit. However, trance mediumship is often misunderstood or confused with possession. People are unaware of what exactly is happening when this kind of overshadowing happens. So it’s always good to bring the info & experiences to people so they get a better sense of this way of working.

So what is this type of mediumship? The spirit person places their energy into the medium’s aura and physical body so that they can produce a transfiguration – change the appearance of the medium. The spirit person can also, with the permission of the medium, use their physical body in order to speak or sign so that communication can take place. There is no ‘taking over’ of the medium in the way that is implied by the way the term possession is used. The medium is always in control and can return to her body at any time. People are often confused that to make a better blend of energy the medium usually works in an altered state of consciousness (trance) similar to a deep meditative state. Some transfiguration can take place in quite a light medative state especially if the medium is experienced with this type of work. However the deeper state is often required to produce ectoplasm for a detailed face mask.

Ectoplasm? The face that appears when a medium is transfiguring is usually produced by a fine layer of a substance called ectoplasm. It’s made from the medium’s body and can appear like a white smoke, a more fibrous or substantial material or similar in thickness to cotton wool. For most mediums a fine layer is substantial enough to imprint with the spirit’s features which then overlay the medium’s face. People see the shadows forming in the substance or over the medium’s face and then notice features changing shape, size or even ones that were not on the medium’s face e.g. mustach, beard. The medium isn’t usually aware of this process happening. It can be a little strange to see one face build up on top of the other. If the overshadowing is more intense it may also be possible for the spirit person to use the vocal chords of the medium to speak to the observers. The medium’s voice may or may not sound different so this has to be taken with any other effects, like changes of features, before it is possible to say that a transfiguration has happened.

Why do it? One of the key points in the contact between our and the Spirit World is the desire to show that they are there and exist alongside us. This type of mediumship is designed to give us in this world more experiential evidence for the reality of a Spirit World. The key point is that it is an experiment in contact that we can try for ourselves if we wish. It’s not necessary to be the medium doing the trance – watching it happen can be challenging enough. Being involved in a trance session can give you information that you have obtained with your own eyes. That information is presented to you to get you thinking. A lot of people are unsure what happens after we leave our physical body. Seeing a  trancefiguration we may find ourselves opening up to the idea of anothe kind of existence.

I love working in this way. It’s a deeper connection with loved ones, with positive Spirit energy and an interesting experiment every time I do it. If you get a chance to see a transfiguration medium why not go along and see what you see & sense?

Day 103 of my blogging challenge.

Friends: Fair-weather or Forever

imageOne of the topics I’m often asked about is friends, friendships and spirituality. People frequently find that as they discover their spiritual side or are on their spiritual journey the people they mix with change. Some friends drift away, new friends arrive and there is a significant change in how we feel about the people we call friends. This process can be upsetting, refreshing, challenging or exciting. It can be confusing that a long held friendship suddenly fades. Or that someone who is an aquaintance feels more of a familiar friend than a once well known friend.

It can be hard to know what these changes are about. It can be harder to accept that the friendship is on the wane or even over completely. We want certainty in our lives. Most of us prefer predictable patterns than outright spontaneity. Our friendships form a part of our comfort zone. Like a warm security blanket knowing that the same people are going to be in our lives can somehow protect us from feeling alone or abandoned. As humans we have a great need for community. So we tend to hold onto our friends though all sorts of situations & experiences. Only if something major happens do we give up on the friendship.

So when I started to tell people I was developing my mediumship it soon became clear that some of my friends couldn’t handle that part of my life. Whether through fear, religious beliefs, disbelief or reluctance to be open minded those people drifted away. One or two even left very abruptly. I asked my Guides why this should be so. What had I done for them to want to unfriend me? With much loving kindness my Guides explained  that I had started on a journey that not everyone would be able to share or understand. We each have to choose the connections we keep in this life. But the choice goes both ways. It isn’t possible to keep someone who doesn’t want to be your friend. And no matter how much time, energy and commitment you give to the friendship if it turns out to be one sided then it’s not in your best interest.

I was sad to see some of the most unexpected people move out of my life over a few years. It seemed my journey was too far outside of their expectations – that we had to part. In my sad moments I asked my Guides how I could deal with my loss. Once again they offered me an option. They asked me to think about all of the love we had shared as friends, all of the happy memories and good times. They asked me to see that my life would have been poorer if that friend hadn’t been sharing with me. And they asked me to send my friends loving wishes for their new journeys for we all need as much positive energy as we can get. Then they asked me to let go of the friendship.

The letting go wasn’t easy. Especially when friends left in an unpleasant or upsetting way. We often call them fair weather friends. The ones who take from the relationship but give back very little. Or the ones who were unhappy that their life will be affected by our changing priorities. I remember being criticised for being unhelpful, unsupportive and refusing to give whatever it was they felt they wanted. I wondered if I had dreamed up all the times I had given into the relationship. I tried to count all of the times I had received nothing back – not even a thank you. It was draining, harsh and emotional. Keeping me going was the gentle presence of my Guides and the friendship of the people who stayed with me as I journeyed.

Then there were the times when new friendships formed. I asked my Guides time after time would this or that person be a forever friend. Could this be a relationship that lasted & lasted even if we didn’t see or connect with each other very often? My Guides were very clear. They asked me to wait & see. They encouraged me to put aside any worry or fear based on the progress of past friendships. They helped me to learn that the friends to keep are the ones who not only say what they will do but who also do what they say they will do. They helped me to sense the energy flow in the friendship. If I was doing a lot of giving almost all the time with not much energy being returned they encouraged me to be brave and accept it wasn’t a forever kind of relationship. They helped me to understand that some people can’t share the intimacy of a friendship because they are still carrying past disappointments. They discussed with me where the line lay between friendship, business and family. I am very blessed to have some amazing forever friends. They are there for me even if we don’t see or speak to each other every day, week, month or year. I’m also blessed to have had the fair-weather friends who have helped me to develop my own strength, boundaries and perseverance. Without the fair-weather people I wouldn’t have been able to value the forever people.

It’s also interesting that we make choices about our friendships based on only half, or even less, of the full info. When couples or families separate or split up some people follow one side & some the other. Not many friends stay friends with both sides. There is a guilty little feeling that somehow if we do we are being disloyal to the side we have stayed connected to. So how do we choose? Often we designate one person as the victim, the one in need of support, or the one who we most identify with. Yet that can be equally the same for the other person. But we choose not to see it. When this type of friendship breakdown happened to me guess what I asked the Guides! Why didn’t I get picked to be the friend? What did I do wrong? Why couldn’t they see my pain too? As ever they stepped in to encourage me to see that friendship isn’t some kind of competition. There are no winners and looser in the way I was asking about it.  There is always free will choice. We judge situations and make a choice based on what we want to do for ourselves. These friendships stopped because, for their own reasons, the other person didn’t want them to continue. It suited them. My Guides asked me to notice who was trying their best to stay connected with me (& the other person), how I helped them to stay connected to me & whether I was the one doing the pushing away.

My spiritual journey has brought me into contact with so many people now that I have learned another valuable thing. There are the one meeting friendships too. These rich exchanges are there for myself & the other person to share a warmth of connection, exchange experiences and shine a positive light into both of our lives. Even if it’s only for  five minutes, half an hour, three hours. What matters is the loving connection that can be made, enjoyed and remembered. I have had a wonderful amount of one meeting friendships so far in my journey. I am fascinated that the Universe brings me one of these at exactly the right moment for me. These friendships enrich my daily life. They are forever friendships- little bubbles of time where the authentic me & you can shine through. And that is another wonderful thing to know. My forever friendships are with people who are happy to be their authentic selves, moment to moment, mood to mood. I would not have understood that if I had not had the fair-weather friends too. Isn’t friendship a wonderful gift!

 Day 94 of my blogging challenge.

Inspiration & Inspirers

12657402_10153959258422959_5010162208183173721_oInspiration? What inspires me and who? I always talk about my Guides and Inspirers when I’m doing services, messages and teaching. And sometimes people say I inspire them. How lovely to be able to help someone work something out; to draw from them the answers they always held; or, to create a flow of positive energy from  myself to others. I’m fortunate to be working with Inspirers from the Spirit World who are recognised as positive, high vibrational beings. They help me to stay grounded as well as to work through my own knotty issues and challenges. Their encouragement, in the face of my own stubbornness, is awesome. They have been patient, creative and super special at motivating me, moving me forward and nudging me along a path I might otherwise never have taken.

When I sat down tonight to write my blog I so much wanted to be on track with my challenge. I needed inspiration. Tomorrow will be 90 days of blogging – something I couldn’t imagine at the beginning because I’ve had writers block for a long time. What do I write about my day? Will I be repeating myself? Is it getting boring for anyone who reads this regularly? At once my Inspirers sent back a whole chorus of no’s. Apparently I’m not repeating myself – the different Guides have been stepping in to make sure my blog has new content & different points of view. That makes sense. Some of my blogs have been written in a near trance state – so much so that I can’t even remember what I’ve posted. They are happy to have been given a voice. It means they have been able to inspire the people who needed the words that were typed on those days. I’ve also had a chance to find my own voice & use it to pass on my views. It’s a process going on for me to be my authentic self – bit by bit letting more of me show to the world. feeling ok that I can share my reality with people and agree to disagree if my world isn’t their world.

Who else inspires me? Inspiration came in one word – Music! They suggested that I write about one of my great loves. Not reading this time. One of the other great inspirations throughout my life has been music. A piece of music can uplift me, take me into a new world or take me out of the world for a while. I’ve been blessed with a musical family. There has been music around me all of my life. It’s been my escape from teenage angst, my refuge in times of change and my strength to be creative when something new is needed. Music makes me laugh, cry, dance. Music helps me mediate or relax. Music lulls me to sleep. Music keeps me focused when I exercise. Music is in my head when I wake up. Music appears in the messages I give. I’m actually listening to Lisa Tarbuck on BBC Radio 2 at the moment. There is a wonderful mix of music flowing through my ears, making me tap my feet and sing along at the top of my voice.

So I wondered if it would be possible to list my personal top 10. Possibly the most impossible task I’ve undertaken! Yet I’d love to inspire you to work out your inspirational top ten too. How wonderful to have a CD that you can put on any time you needed encouragement. Or, for those of you able to cope with downloading to things like iPods, having your inspirational playlist at the ready. So here is my list (perhaps I should have gone for my top 50!).

Annie’s Top 10 Inspirational Music Choices

  1. Robbie Williams                              Angels
  2. David Bowie                                     Heroes
  3. Russell Watson                               Where My Heart Will Take Me
  4. Abba                                                  Super Trooper
  5. Simon & Garfunkel                        The Sound of Silence
  6. Bette Midler                                    The Rose
  7. Queen                                               We Are The Champions
  8. Alfie Boe & Matt Lucas                 He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother
  9. Monty Python                                Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life
  10. Frankie Goes to Hollywood        The Power of Love

Whew! It’s taken me ages to finish this blog. Of course I’ve had to listen to all of my selections plus the ones that didn’t make it into the top ten. I’ve had a wonderful hour, feel inspired and am ending on a high with the Power of Love flowing through my aura. Who could want more? So, what would your list be?

Day 89 of my blogging challenge.

Lite Spirit: Candles, people, Light

34093-2-550x550Candles feature very much in my life. I’ve been a buyer of candles, candle holders, wax melts & burners for many, many years. Yesterday I went along to a meeting based all around candles as I’m also a part time independent PartyLite consultant with a team. So now, like Ronnie Corbett,  I’m selling candles too. But those candles do occasionally turn into handles. Cue Ronnie Barker. As well enjoying using candles I get an opportunity to meet people who also love candles and, with my team, called Lite Spirits, to spread a lot of light.

Sometimes when I think about my journey into Spiritualism, communicating with Spirits and then passing on messages from the Spirit World I have to wonder what it’s all about. In fact I’ve spent most of my life wondering what Life is all about. Just when I think I understand why I’m here something else gets thrown into the mix and I’m back figuring it all out again. Was that four candles or fork handles? And what about the pump? If you have never seen the classic sketch from Ronnie’s Corbett and Barker please take a few minutes to have a laugh at the misunderstandings.

I’m aware that I can get so caught up in the meaning of life that I forget to have any life. Passing on accurate messages is a big responsibility. It matter so much to the people who need guidance, to hear from their loved ones, or to have some hope in their lives that taking my mediumship seriously is a key part of what I do. That doesn’t mean that there is no laughter, fun or cheerfulness in the connection with Spirit. It does mean that I try my very best to pass on the whole of the communication as clearly as possible. The Spirit people bring in their laughter and fun too so that is a lighter part of the connection. But like most people, when I’m working I know that underneath there is a responsibility to get the job done. Being able to take myself off to another occupation where fun is most definitely at the heart of what I do is a great benefit. And the laughter I share with people when I visit their homes with my candles is a wonderful gift.

It’s interesting that both of the things I love doing are about light. Creating, spreading and sharing the light. I chose to call my team Lite Spirits because the energy vibration from laughter is uplifting. It makes us feel lighter. For a few moments all of our concerns and cares drop away. We can’t feel worried for anxious when we are chuckling, giggling & belly laughing our way through the moments. That’s why we say laughter is the best medicine. The ability to laugh at ourselves, to take life lightly, can see us through bleak or challenging times. Now and again I’m lucky enough to have a chance to talk about my mediumship or the Spirit World when I’m selling candles. My Guides put me in front of someone who needs the information I can give them. At those moments I really do feel a lightness of spirit. I’m here doing what I was meant to be doing to be of service to the people who are supposed to cross my path.

One of the things I hear constantly when we talk about spirituality is that it involves spreading or shining the Light. What Light does that mean? Not the demand of the ego to be the one in the spotlight getting adoration & worship. We also use the Light to mean spreading knowledge, beliefs and values. Or when we are talking about setting an example. The Light can also be the Divine (if you have that as a belief system). Generally we want to be in the community of Light and sharing our Light. Yet, like the fork handles, understanding how to be the Light is harder. There is room for misunderstanding. Not all people who say they are spiritual are shining their Light. Sometimes they are a reflection; they have ‘borrowed’ another person’s Light and are passing it off as their own. Standing in your own true Light isn’t quite as easy as we wish. To do so you have to have a desire to serve yourself & others, an ability to laugh at yourself so you don’t take yourself too seriously and a willingness to be mindful of what you are doing.

So what about the handles? Being able to work with people across many situations gives me an opportunity to let them see that I’m an ordinary, down to earth human being. I can talk about what I do in a straightforward way. I can laugh about all the jokes about psychics who should have known better. I don’t mind being called Septic Peg. Because they have been in contact with me people have some knowledge about what and who a medium or psychic is. If they do decide they want to find out more they have a contact they can use. Or if they want to explore their own abilities there is a way, through me, to get suggestions or support. There is a way they can open doors they perhaps hadn’t though to explore. It’s worth being a handle, selling candles and bringing the Spirit Light into peoples lives.

Day 87 of my blogging challenge.

Self-awareness

imageI’m starting today’s blog thinking about self-awareness. I have done several readings for people and a Reiki Refresh group at the Centre. Those activities got me pondering how much we know our true selves. Of course there are always parts of ourself we hide away, forget or don’t even know about. But I wonder how often we choose to go looking for them.

What came up from my Guides as I worked was a reminder of a question I used to ask a lot. My need was to understand who I am. The question was Why do I have low and high energy vibrations and does it matter? That took me back to my training when I wanted to be a counsellor. We were encouraged to keep a reflective journal so we could identify anything that might be causing us resistance, or to make judgements, or to help us recognise thoughts and feelings we hadn’t noticed. We were expected to analyse our journal entries as if we had been the counselling client. We were teasing out our ‘client’s’ world view so that we could respond in ways  that would resolve any stuck issues. This process would help us to become more self-aware about values, beliefs and judgements that might get in the way of an effective counselling relationship.

When I began working with my Guides to develop my mediumship they also encouraged me to keep a reflective journal so that I could help myself observe my own mediumship development. In the same way I had in counsellor training, I needed to approach my connections with Spirits with a clear understanding of my values, beliefs and judgements. If I didn’t then the energy connection we made would be ‘contaminated’ by my own feelings & thoughts. I might make assumptions that were not correct or interpret a message in a way that had meaning to me but wasn’t actually what the Spirit person meant at all. Both my counselling and my mediumship have, in built, a requirement to be self-aware if I want to do the best I can for others.

Becoming self-aware can be anything but straightforward. It means really examining the thoughts, feelings, actions and reactions you have. It means finding a way to detach from yourself and embrace all that you find out about yourself. It means taking off the masks you wear one by one and learning to live with the most authentic you that you can stand. It is worthwhile though. When I began that second period of self-awareness work with the help of my Guides I was, admittedly, surprised to find lots of admirable and courageous parts of me. There were, of course, some parts of me I wasn’t happy with at all. I saw the need to change some of my patterns of being so that I could be more authentically me. And I also saw how much progress I had made from the very early days of my counselling training.

As the self-awareness work unfolded my Guides also made sure to remind me that I had to be self-aware of my human self and also of my Spirit self. Understanding one half on me wasn’t enough. I had to integrate my authentic Spirit self with my human self so that the higher vibrational Spirit energy could be transmitted out through my human self. So that I would be a Spirit wearing human clothes, not a human with a tiny spark of Spirit behind my eyes.

We have a great capacity to help one another. That capacity is reduced if we forget or don’t acknowledge our spirituality. However, saying that we are spiritual is never enough. We have to feel, think and act as our Spirit self would. If we never discover our authentic Spirit self or even our human self we are not yet on a spiritual path. No matter how many times we tell ourselves & everyone else that we are. If you want to make deeper connections with yourself, other people, with your life get a pen & paper and meet your true self.

Day 81 of my blogging challenge.

Job Title Dilemma

imageDo we have a dilemma in the spiritual side of life about what we call ourselves? Our job title? I certainly find it hard to answer when people ask me what I do. And depending on who is asking and where I am I find I give different answers. Sometimes it’s because to say what I actually do requires a long list of things (any of which can be true at any time), or some of my job titles attract misunderstandings, or when I use certain words or phrases people fit me into a stereotype.

My dilemma began when I was deciding to provide a public service. I started off calling myself a medium & psychic. But was I a spiritualist medium? A trance medium? A clairvoyant? There are lots of ways to describe being the connector for the Spirit World and in the end I settled on being an Intuitive Medium & Psychic because I used my intuition as my means of connecting. I still get asked if I’m a clairvoyant because people don’t understand that this is one kind of mediumship using a particular sense (the third eye to see Spirit). Sometimes they aren’t clear about what intuition is either.

The bit about being psychic is also confusing. A psychic is a person who uses their intuitive senses to connect with living people’s energy. If someone connects with Spirit energy then they have moved into being a medium. Yet people approached me as a psychic asking if I could speak to their loved ones in Spirit. Using your psychic connection you can also use psychic tools like a pendulum, tarot cards, dowsing rods, oracle cards, crystals & much more. You don’t use any of them if you are connecting to Spirit people. We are all psychic to a greater or lesser extent depending very much on if we choose to develop those senses we were born with. So calling myself a psychic is also to say that everyone on the planet could use the word psychic in their job description.

As things moved on for me it seemed I was destined to be a teacher. One way or another my Guides wangled it that I wound up teaching the teachers. I had a lot of resistance to adding teacher to my job description as it conjured up more stereotypes & the faint feeling that I’m not an ‘expert’ enough in anything to be teaching. So I plodded on with being a spiritual counsellor, a pastoral counsellor, a facilitator and a spiritual coach. I was avoiding job titles like guru, master, sage, oracle. It seemed to me that these titles often resulted in more stereotypical misunderstandings or the distinct secondary question of ‘who says you are’.

Then it was time for me to improve my ability to channel healing energy. Off I went to become a Reiki Master/Teacher. More headaches about job title. I had the certification to say the I was both a master and a teacher. However, not a lot of people understood what Reiki was. Sometimes it still fits into the category of slightly strange & a little bit out there for quite a number of people. I felt as if my dilemma was getting more challenging. For the past couple of days some very lovely people have been helping me, knowingly or not, find a job title that is clear about what I do but, more importantly, says who I am. So I have to thank Dawn, Nixi and Alan for prompting me to think about how Annie Conboy describes herself to the world.

I’ve occasionally said about my work that ‘I’m a jack of all trades and master of none’ when I’ve been trying to name what I do. There are so many things that fall into my remit as an Intuitive Something that a list would go on for a really long time. Somehow that fact that I do lots of things (and can do them well) gets lost when put beside someone who has specialised in getting good at their one job. So it was really wonderful to be reminded that the follow on to that first line is ‘though often times better than master of one’. I am an ace integrater. I can take bits & pieces from everywhere and weave them into something that works, makes sense or has a creative outcome. Staying in one discipline would only have shown me one point of view. My dilemma is eased by knowing that my job title is valuable because it represents a willingness to learn, specialise for a bit & then go back to learning something different.

To reflect what is at the heart of everything I do a much truer title would be Master Energy Shaper. People still wouldn’t get what it means though. It doesn’t say what it is on the tin. So perhaps in the pursuit of spirituality there is an implied, comfortable, recognition that one job title isn’t enough. So today I was very much doing the Centre Director job, this evening I was doing the Intuitive Medium job and tomorrow, who knows what job title I’ll use.

Day 80 of my blogging challenge.

Wardrobe disaster – Aura baggage

I’m often asked how someone can improve their connection to the Spirit World. When I say ‘Wardrobe disaster’ they often look blank. It makes no sense. What has a wardrobe disaster got to do with the Spirits of our loved ones? I had the same blank look when I asked my Guides to help me get more accuracy in my messages and evidence. There was a lot of gentle laughter and a delicate pulling together of several threads of knowledge I already had stored away in my mind. So let me explain what they told me.

Part of our human identity tends to be the clothes we wear, the ‘look’ we adopt and the fashion we follow. Clothes act as a visual short-cut to who we are. We present our style to the world as the outward reflection of our inner self. We also use clothing styles as a stereo typing short cut – goth, designer, hippie, rocker, sporty to name but a few. Our clothes also allow us to blend in with whoever we decide is our tribe. They bring a sense of belonging and security. Or of wishing to be something when we don’t think we really are. They can give clues to our ambitions, our state of mind, our values and our judgements. Because we all look at what the person is wearing and decide whether they ‘belong’ or not.

If, like me, you have been searching the whole of your life for an identity, tribe or particular values your wardrobe might still contain lots of clothing that you have symbolically outgrown. I even have one of my baby dresses carefully put away with my first baby shoes. There have been many outfits that didn’t fit, were restricting, were only a fad or wore out quickly. I’ve worn the strangest combinations, colours that did nothing for me and items either scratchy & uncomfortable or so ill-fitting that I got exasperated. So plenty of disasters. Yet I hang on to some of these items because they are still really new, might come in one day or represent memories.

My wardrobe contains a lot of baggage. It’s suggested that anything you haven’t worn for six months should be donated to charity or thrown away. Why do I find that so difficult? I admit to resisting a great big wardrobe clear out. The clothes do represent aspects of me – the bits I decided not to be. There might be time to try those ‘outfits’ still. My Guides love my determination to keep my wardrobe full to bursting. But they also explain that hanging on to old energy – represented by the clothes – makes it hard for new energy to come in. How will I be able to get space for my new fashion look if I don’t clear out the old stuff? Especially since what I’m hanging on to could be classed as the ‘disasters’ – parts of me I really don’t want to be again (suits with large padded shoulders springs to mind) or that I’ve worn much too often (I’m thinking of my liking for faded jeans for all occasions, weddings & funerals included).

They use the discussion about a wardrobe to help me understand that my aura is full of energy (& not only the energy obtained in this life). Every single moment of my life is captured in the way the energy flows or sticks in my etheric body. So there are lots of patches of free flowing energy alongside patches that have become static. Where the energy flows freely the Spirit people, who are also energy, can connect with me and transfer information to me. My intuition and conscious mind can translate that info into a conversation, messages or evidence from the Spirit. The fixed energy is like a barrier. It gets in the way of the info coming through. It stops me translating the Spirit energy into something useful. Like a wardrobe packed too tight with old clothes there is no room to squash the new ones in. The stuck patches are where I have held onto an experience, perhaps been hurt by it, or angry with it or fearful of what I’ve encountered. Those fixed blocks represent sadness, disappointment, rejection, hate, lack, loneliness and so much more. They are the clothes that don’t fit, are uncomfortable or the wrong style & colour.

If I want to communicate more clearly I really have to deal with the stuck energy. So, with their gentle encouragement, I started to take the ‘clothes’ out of my wardrobe. Some had to be put back as I wasn’t ready to let them go. Many were released to be used elsewhere. I found I had spaces. Room to change and grow. New outfits to try and buy. Bit by bit my baggage has disappeared. It’s not all gone. There are still outfits I’m holding on to and some of them also relate to my past lives. I’m comfortable that when the right moment comes I will let those clothes go too. I’m also open to trying on new clothes because I know I have all the space I need to accommodate them. I have turned a wardrobe disaster into wardrobe freedom.

Turning an aura disaster into aura freedom is also possible if you start by acknowledging that you have been hanging on to past experiences much too tightly. Exploring why you are resisting the letting go process is a key part of understanding the deeper meaning that the experiences have had. Often you will find that the experiences represent judgements you have made (or taken on board) about yourself. The stuck energy can become like a mask you wear to keep yourself safe from similar experiences. Removing the mask is a brave act. You are freeing up space to allow yourself to grow. It may seem that there is no benefit from freeing up space. That it’s all rather challenging. Yet what you gain is the increased connection with Energy Beings. The loving presence of your Guides and Inspirers.

The practical ‘how to empty your aura’ is out there everywhere. I use my own Aura & Past Life meditations as well as a Violet Flame meditation. I enjoy, crystals, journaling, painting and self-refelction. I listen to what others discuss, suggest or have tried. I schedule regular wardrobe clearing times. I listen to my inner guidance when it tells me space is getting tight again. Most of all, I’m aware that I will go on collecting wardrobe disasters. I allow myself to try on new experiences, new fashions and new clothes balanced with the understanding that I don’t have to put them in my wardrobe at all. But if I do, that’s ok too. One day I will recycle their energy, when they have served their purpose and I am ready to grow some more. How much space is their in your ‘wardrobe’ for the new? Is it time to do some recycling?

Day 79 of my blogging challenge.

Love is in the air

imageIt’s nearly February! Valentine’s Day is on the way! Where did the first month of the year go? I sat with my lovely friend Jan Booth, the founder of Ostrich Angels today, as we both wondered how the time had managed to pass by in a blur. It was one of our regular catch ups to discuss the projects we are collaborating on. Both of us are independent women with a passion for what we do. Both of us follow our intuition in making our decisions. And both of us were drafted in by the Earth’s ArchAngels to distribute a new wave of positive energy flowing from them to all of us. That energy is unconditional Love.

By a series of synchronicities Jan & I met, developed a range of fragrances and turned that project into another range of fragrances which have turned into several more ranges. We’re not sure when it will all stop but we are loving every moment of the journey. That is the key thing underpinning our creative work. We love discovering more from the Energy Beings who step in close. We love all the ideas they bring us (even if some of these have to be ‘parked’ right now). We love that we don’t really know where we are going but the exploration is a great adventure.

So how are we helping to spread the Love? One of our first scents was the one we christened Love. We found we were developing a range we had to call the Pearls of Wisdom. Our Guides were very clear that this range would help people set an intention for themselves which would create the energy they gave out and received. Jan took the fragrance and turned it into a soap. That wasn’t enough though. Our Guides prompted, pushed and encouraged us to look at other ways the scent could get out into the world. A spray soon followed along with t light candles. The energy vibration of Love, based around rose quartz, appeals to a sense we often ignore. Yet we spend a lot of money on scent based products to make our selves and homes appealing.

I love the scent of Love. It reminds me of the newborn baby smell, a mix of talc, sweetness and bubblegum. When I use the spray on me I get an instant lift in my mood. Another way I put love in the air is to use the spray on my healing tree. Every day I send out distant healing. Using the spray reminds me that I’m sending out loving, supportive and positive energy to all who need it. It sets the intention for the help I want others to receive from the energy going out to them.

I work with energy vibrations. That is how I read Auras and connect with Spirit and other energy beings. Over time I’ve understood more and more that my personal energy vibration can become less clear, of lower energy and get clogged or stuck. The energy can stop flowing properly. A large part of developing my mediumship has been spending time cleaning up my energy so that the higher vibrational Energy Beings can connect with me more easily. Using the Love products has set my intention to myself. It has reminded me every day that I am a Spirit/Human being full of love and able to give & receive love. My vibration stays higher than it used to do. Just the smell of the soap or spray is enough to lift my mood. If you are now imagining me running into the bathroom to sniff my soap from time to time you are spot on, lol! I carry a spray in my handbag for a quick blast if I’m in a challenging situation. I’m totally hooked on Love.

What do you do to remind yourself that you are Love? How do you send out unconditional love? Do you let yourself receive the love that is all around you? Your Guides & Angels are tapping you on the shoulder. They want you to have that positive energy vibration from them and others. Love is in the air so make sure you get your share.

Day 72 of my blogging challenge.