It’s been a reflective day for me. It’s the ninth anniversary of my Dad, Sean, passing to the Spirit World. He really wanted to go. My Mum, Ellen, left three years before him and he missed her very much.

Yet he kept going. The gap in his heart was enormous but he stayed here for us as long as he could. They had a long time together so we knew he would find it hard to adjust. But some how he did. The last time I saw him we had a lovely conversation whilst my daughter was busy wrecking his precious garden. He seemed to have mellowed. I know we often fell out, then in, then out again. Perhaps we were too alike somehow. My daughter told him ‘I love you Grandad Sean’. As I left we hugged. I told him I loved him and would see him soon. I’m very grateful that that was my last memory of him.

Sean went to Ireland to visit his family and friends. When he came back he played with the band that was the second love of his life. Apparently he had a rare old time playing his accordion. I’m sure there was plenty of craic as well as beer. The lads thought he was on fine form. Two days later he died in the night. What a way to go. Swiftly, with all of his family and friends able to remember him at his best. It wasn’t easy for any of us to take in. He hadn’t been particularly ill. But Sean had passed the way I’m sure he had always wanted. Quickly and without fuss. He hated hospitals and dreaded the thought of being ill.

You might think I’m painting a rosy picture of a loving family man. My dad was no saint. There was a side to Sean that was hard to live with sometimes.

Yet I always knew he loved us. And he loved my mother more. He worked hard because he felt he had to provide for us. He was a man’s man in that Irish way of charming stubbornness that he inherited from his upbringing. We were orphaned when he passed. That’s how it felt to me. Both Mum and Dad provided the anchor to our family. The connection and the thread between us. There is nothing else quite like it. As a family we have survived the shock, disbelief and early grief at his passing. I know as I raise a glass to my Dad tonight the rest of my family will be thinking of him too.

That is the most precious gift of all. I have a family because of my Mum and Dad. My daughter has roots and connections because of my parents and our family. Just knowing that they are in the world keeps me grounded. And knowing that my Mum and Dad will be having a party in the Afterlife once again, with the music flowing, and dancing, is the icing on my particular cake. This is the day Sean was reborn into the Pink Perfect to a new life with all of his family and friends. Happy Birth Day Dad.

Day 310 of my blogging challenge.