Stopping. That’s what I have been doing today. Not slowing down or taking it easy but doing nothing at all. I’ve listened to my body and spent a day in bed. Rather than soldier on and let my cold be pushed to one side.

I know the expectation we set for ourselves is to keep going. To push any illness aside and  carry on as if everything is normal. Yet when I do so I find my illness is extended longer that it needs to be. Stopping everything also feels strange because there is a great deal of social pressure to continue juggling all of my tasks. There is a strong push, a work ethic, deep in most of us to turn up and do what we need to even if our body is protesting. Yet that push has often pushed me beyond my limits. Making me take much longer to recover in the end.

So stopping everything today has been a big step forward for me. Giving myself permission to embrace my cold and stay inactive is almost a first. I am getting used to listening to my body as well as my feelings and thoughts. As a result of spending a day sleeping I’ve given my body a good run at clearing the cold symptoms from my system. I’m on the mend. And my body knows I want to be well. Also that I am prepared to do what I need to get well. It’s part of my shift to put myself first. That can be difficult for people who know they are here to help others. Because the desire to keep helping often overrides the requirement to look after oneself.

Today I feel that I have stepped into a new appreciation of myself. Stopping has made that possible. I also know that when I start again I will be paying more attention to my body than before. So that if I need to stop again, even for a short time, I will do as my body needs immediately. Wellbeing is a balance. Today I’ve found that balance.

Day 821 of my blogging challenge