Speak of I, Me Not You, Us, Them or We

speakWhen I speak it’s very tempting to drift into using ‘you’, ‘us’ or ‘we’ when I really mean ‘I’. It’s one of the things I really noticed when I started giving people Spirit messages.

You or we has become a habit for me. It developed a long time ago so it has been hard to break out from it. Especially in my speaking work. I hear myself using ‘we’ to say what the Spirit people are saying or when I’m trying to describe how mediumship works. These collective pronouns leap to the front. It’s as if I my experiences only have validity if they apply to more than me. So ‘all people’ … Or ‘we all know’ … Even ‘those of us’ … And ‘you all say’ … The pronouns trip off my tongue so easily as I speak, readily giving me the sense of belonging. They link me to a shared identity, opinion or value. They also trap me because my own identity, opinion or values are hidden underneath a collective idea of belonging.

I lose my own voice. Even my own sense of self. I am not speaking from my position as an ‘I’ meaning individual. I have become merged, lumped in, invisible. This became much more apparent to me when I had to find my writing voice. I have a handy free little widget on my web site called Yoast SEO. It’s there to help me climb the Google ranking by letting search engines find my web pages. It tells me when I’m using a passive voice in my writing. Especially when I do too much you, us, them, we. Of course I’ve had to think about my sentence construction. Reminding myself that I speak to others exactly like I would talk. So I have to come from an ‘I’ perspective.

Though that does make explaining things slightly more tricky. Because I have to own what I am saying. I can’t bounce it off to others. I have to speak for myself and my ideas.

It all boils down to saying what I believe instead of generalising. The more I’ve written the stronger my writing voice has become. All due to owning my ‘I’ ness when I’m speaking in my blog or anywhere else. When I read back what I have written I’m checking to see that I own my views. Looking to connect with the authenticity of me. And being clear that I speak as an individual from my heart. I guess what I’m saying is that I am finally owning myself. This goes further too. In my speaking voice I am clear that I speak for the Spirit World but the way I do so is my own. They can ask me to pass a message across but how it actually arrives will be filtered through my words.

My Guides like me owning my share of the message. I have always been encouraged by them to speak as I find, to give what I get or say what I see. They recognise the ‘I’ in our humanity even as we work hard to hide in a collective language. My Guides have also pushed me to find my true self. I’ve been supported by my experiences to really find and say all that I believe to be right for me. I feel that is the ultimate beauty and reward of speaking with my ‘I’ voice. Because I have something unique to contribute. Although it might be similar to what others say it will always have an energy of me attached. My Guides remind me that knowing my ‘I’ as absolutely as possible will bring me the greater blending with we, us and them.

You see … I have to exist before I can become we and then us. Collectively we all exist together to speak and listen in equal measure. Because the Spirit World is the loving surrender of I to we, where giving and receiving finally balance out. Own yourself when you speak so that all of us can own our community.

Day 711 of my blogging challenge

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