I’ve been chatting today about my early days of developing mediumship. About the way in which feeding the medium information can easily overtake getting and giving a message.

From almost the first moment I started to go and watch mediums I remember wanting to have a message for myself. I was fascinated to see what the medium might say about my loved ones. And what they might want to say to me. Especially since I was experiencing my own kind of awakening. I was having to grapple with not quite believing that there was a Spirit World and information that came to me on a regular basis from a part of me that said it was a Spirit person. I wondered if I was feeding an unhealthy mental state that I could be developing. Rather than being someone who was actually developing mediumship. I was keen to discuss mediumship with just about everyone.

So when people talked about ‘feeding’ the medium I wanted to know more. Thankfully the ladies of the local churches were happy to explain. Since a lot of people believe mediumship is all about ‘cold reading’ – guesses and skilful extraction from the person of personal info – mediums are keen to avoid being given any information from the person they are reading for. If someone says more than yes, no or don’t know there is a temptation to go on explaining. And I know, once someone has explained, if what they have told me is the next thing I’m supposed to say then it will sound lame. Even false. It could mean the person rejects the whole message. That’s a real waste of everyone’s energy, including the Spirit person.

Hence the stress on not feeding the medium any facts during the time the Spirit person is speaking. Which I found hard at first. Simply because I wanted feedback that what I was saying was correct.

I found there was an urge in me to want to understand the message I was giving to someone. That led me into another side issue. The temptation to feed myself with information by ending up asking questions. That’s a trap all beginning mediums fall into. But of course the questions are a form of feeding that can end up making the message sound fake. With the help of these very knowledgable ladies I shut down on asking questions. I turned my information into statements. And I insisted on yes, no or don’t know. Even though I understood, having been on the receiving end of messages by then, that all someone wanted to do was be helpful.

The urge to explain is a form of politeness. I don’t like to see anyone struggle to get or build a link with my loved ones. I’m also keen to hear what they might have to say. So jumping in and feeding explanations to the medium is a genuine attempt to make sure the message comes through for me. Although I’m also opening the way for me to doubt what is said. Or for the message to develop into some sort of conversation between me and the medium instead. That’s why now I stay as quiet as possible. I keep myself to yes or no answers as much as I can. And I only say yes when I can really understand what the medium is giving me. That means when the medium is giving me clear evidence my yes is strong.

Feeding the medium, apart from giving me a cup of tea & a biscuit afterwards, is something I avoid at all costs. Both in my own mediumship and when I’m getting a message. Because it makes the mediumship stronger. I am getting a clear connection with my loved ones and, as they know me, the evidence they give will help me trust the message too.

PS. No mediums were harmed in the writing of this blog. There have been ample supplies of tea and biscuits available at the end of each paragraph!

PPS. I include the Wikipedia link about cold reading although I don’t agree with the way it lumps all sorts of intuitive practitioners in with scam artists. I have been able to demonstrate my mediumship when in a room away from the sitter, with no visual or verbal cues to prompt what I have been given by Spirit people.

Day 713 of my blogging challenge