I’ve been out to do a church service tonight. Afterwards there was a discussion about how to develop mediumship. And especially about confidence.

Like anything in life, when I start to learn something new, trying to develop a skill or ability, I go through a process of finding confidence in what I can do. But I usually start that process lacking in confidence. Perhaps feeling incompetent. Or even scared about what I’m expecting myself to do. That has happened with everything I have tried in my life. So it’s worth understanding that feeling like I lack confidence is a normal part of getting a new skill. When I take that on board I can be a bit less judgemental about what I’m managing to achieve. I might even be able to let myself see that I’m doing great for the stage of development I’ve reached. Best of all, I might even let myself start to feel a bit more confident.

Mediumship has to develop like any other skill or ability. It’s not something that is suddenly perfect. Or nearly perfect actually. Mediumship, like everything else, takes time, practice, discipline and that build up of self belief. It will continue to develop the more you do it. I know I am much better at connecting now than I was eleven years ago. Especially since I am confident in what I am doing. And I feel competent in what I’m doing too. However, I had to do an awful lot of practice to get to this point. And that was the point of tonight’s discussion. I had to give myself permission to get things wrong. To be comfortable, as much as possible, with hazy, incomplete or weak messages. I had to take every opportunity I could to be giving messages. And I had to stop being too hard on myself. Expecting too much too soon.

I could be talking about any achievement in life. It takes discipline, patience and persistence to develop yourself. I have learned to be confident that I will get to the standard I set for myself. Only not on day one, one hundred or one thousand. But that I will!

Day 694 of my blogging challenge