Darkness Pressing In: Dreaming of Freedom

I don’t know where I went in my dreams last night. But the darkness certainly felt like it was pressing in. I was restless. Keen to get out of the dreams.

Searching for my freedom from something I remember waking up trying to recall a word. I know I said it in my dreams. It seemed to connect them all together. And it also seemed to be the key to setting me free. Free from what I wondered? From my fears came bouncing back at me. Along with another thought. Voiced by someone else. Karma is when you recieve the pain you caused others. Then have to feel it. As well as live it. It took me a little while to get back into balance. Looking back at my life I know there are threads that tie together. Waiting in the darkness of my shadow side are patterns and habits that drive me even when I think I’m making rational choices.

I thought about the delight I felt yesterday when I made my book ‘live’ to be purchased next week. The first copy is winging it’s way to me already. Yet, following the feel of my dreams last night, today has been one of potential setbacks. One stride forward three thousand steps back. But I also realise that the darkness in me is trying it’s best to swamp me. After all, if I do make big changes in my life my Ego Mind has nothing to frighten me with. It won’t be able to keep me small. Does that mean that I will play out endless karma? How can I release myself from what I have created? That’s the reminder I was being given. It’s time to challenge myself to embrace that darkness and show it some light.

Yet I feel I have been doing that for a year. The darkness has been in and around me pulling me back every time the light has pulled me forward.

I know that the resistance from the Ego Mind is at it’s highest at the tipping point when change is only a fraction of a step away. Then there’s the fact that I am catching the energy of the second big wave meant to shift us all forward. September has been heavy with unpredictable energy. Surfacing, clearing and surfacing the fears for me once more. This shift, at it’s peak tomorrow, is all about letting us know that everything that can happen happens somewhere. What that means is that the energy between the parallel worlds is very thin. We get a glimpse down the trouser legs of time, as Terry Pratchett would have put it. I have been experiencing, through my dreams, the me who made different choices.

The exchange of energy has shown me who I would have been, and who I am, in another life. Also who I am with and what I am doing in that series of lives. Because I’m picking up more than one life. So it’s easy for me to get lost or confused about what is actually happening in this life. I know it’s a hard thing to process. I spent a lot of the morning trying to check which life I was in whilst my Ego Mind kicked up a load of fear energy. The point of recognising parallel lives helps me to let go of those fears though. Somewhere, in some life, I am doing all of the things I dream about doing in this life. There are infinite possibilities. So I’m also lucky that I like the way my life is now. And where it’s going. That way the darkness doesn’t suck me into a fear state.

Once this current ‘thin-ness’ between the dimensions passes it will be up to me how much darkness I keep in my life. My dreams also showed me that I can be free. The key to being free is being me. The one driving the choices in this life from my Spirit self, not my Ego Mind. The missing word is authentic. Puzzle solved!

Day 673 of my blogging challenge 

Bumping Into A New Direction At Last

Bumping carSometimes it takes a bit of a jolt to get my attention. Bumping my car yesterday was one of those moments. In a weekend of strange and weird moments this was one that really got me thinking.

Of course, when I looked at some files this evening it all made perfect sense. But bumping into a wall was the key point for me to make a decision. I have to say it wasn’t a serious accident. I’ve had a bit of a stiff neck, shoulders and back today. And my car needs some cosmetic repairs. But the jolt of sliding into a stone wall certainly electrified my mind. For the rest of the day there was a little voice in there asking me how I wanted to spend the rest of my time on the Earth. A kind of invitation to check in with the direction my life was taking. With a view to making sure I was enjoying myself.

I had a good day with the Thin Places group. And a chance to stand on a high point to see things from a higher perspective. As well as recognising the fun of sharing my ideas with other people. When I got back to the office today I started pulling out the files I use to keep my work organised. One after another, like bumping into the wall again, I saw the titles bouncing me around again. They were activities I have wanted to do all year. All dated 2016. It’s taken me a year to get back to the focus I had when I made up the folders. But I’m coming back to them very much clearer where they fit in my bigger picture.

Because I’ve spent a year bumping into the bits of me that have held me back. All sorts of beliefs and values muddled in with doubts and fears.

Yesterday gave me a chance to think about my work. And ask myself again why I do certain things. Especially if I’m not really passionate about them. I know it can be hard to let go of what I feel I should, must, ought or have a duty to do. Yet I also know that often those SMOD’s are the needs and demands of others. Not my own. The last year has been about releasing myself from other people’s expectations. Because I have to be able to do what fits for me. Rather than try to fit with what fits for others. That way leaves me bumping against their interpretation of my life. And how they think I should live it. Not in a nasty way. But because that’s what we tend to do to each other.

Placing conditions on what is given and received. Stepping back over the last few days I’ve been able to appreciate that conditionality. And to choose to remove the barriers to what I require or desire in my life. Now it’s full steam ahead for Embrace Intuitive Mentoring and my writing. There is even a little space left for my painting. Out go the groups and workshops of the last ten years. Although there will be a little online teaching work for part of 2018. The folders are ready. I’m ready. All that remains is the tidying up of loose ends and clearing of space. Although I know that will be made much easier because I am ready to make the changes I need in my life. So the Universe will make sure it unfolds in exactly the way it needs to.

Bumping the car reminded me not to waste the time and energy I have. It gave me something immediate to focus on. In the moment my sub-conscious mind made a string of decisions. And confirmed my intuitions of 12 months ago. Time to drive a new route!

Day 658 of my blogging challenge 

Kilmartin Glen: A Thin Place Tour With Mindie Burgoyne

Kilmartin GlenI’ve had an energy adventure today. A trip to Kilmartin Glen up near Lochgilphead in Scotland. A place of ancient energy sites dating back 4-5,000 years.

I had been invited to join a group tour run by my friend Mindie Burgoyne, the Travel Hag blogger, writer and tour organiser. She and her husband Dan had brought a group of people from the United States. I was delighted when Mindie invited me to join them at Kilmartin Glen to see Dunnad Fort and the remains of cairns, circles and cists. There are certainly plenty of them there. The fort is a testing climb but the view from the top is spectacular. The site has been occupied since the Iron Age. It’s also the place where kings were crowned.

Using my pendulum I stoped in various places on the rocky hill fort to tune into the energy. I like to strip away the layers of energy impressions to see how far back I can track human occupation. I liked the protected feel I got from the energy flow. All down through the timeline. I also hit a deep band of ceremonial energy related to the creation of kings. It was strongly masculine, rather fierce and very proud. I could also see all across Kilmartin Glen. The hill fort would have been very noticeable from any approach towering above the surrounding flat land. There is a footprint in the rock and a bowl shape near it for water. I felt i had to share some energy with the place as a repayment for ‘reading’ it’s aura.

When we came down from the hill fort I went with the tour to other sites in the Kilmartin Glen. With the help of a local guide I was able to understand the layout and timeline of some of the remains.

There is certainly still energy in the standing stones and the circle we visited. I was delighted to find the Mother Stone of one circle at Temple Wood. She gave me a lovely burst of energy as she acknowledged my contact with her. That’s why I love Thin Places. The point where the energies of the past are close to the surface. And the places where I can step more easily between worlds. In fact, anyone can if they open up their intuitive abilities. So it was interesting to discuss with the other people what they were experiencing. Sharing information can often confirm a single experience because others have had it too.

That’s what I like about evidenced based work. I find it really useful to validate what I have sensed with the experiences of other people. And this very friendly group of people were happy to share their thoughts and feelings. In the end, that’s the best outcome for all of us. To go on an adventure, experience the energy and share our thoughts. I enjoy listening to different points of view. Or questions. Because it makes me think about my own experiences. And what they might mean or be interpreted as. Of course my Guides love to send me on these experiences. Because I learn so much. And get inspiration for further explorations I can carry out.

I’m sure I will be back at Kilmartin Glen and Dunnad Fort. There is a museum to explore, more monuments and plenty of walking routes to try. All to tune into the energy and find out more about this Thin Place. I cant’s wait!

Day 657 of my blogging challenge 

Neolithic Highway: Moving On Down The Road?

Today I’ve been blown along the Neolithic Highway. A road between two lochs that seems to be full of standing stones and Neolithic villages. What was the draw for our ancestors?

All along this highway it seems they were encouraged to settle, build large monuments and then, after about a thousand years, to move on. The road winds from a settlement that is now on the edge of the sea, but was once well inland, down past two stones circles and two more settlements. I’m sure there are many more buildings still to be discovered. Was it the promise of fresh water? Or that seals come to shelter their young in the safety of an inland lake? Was it the warmer climate giving good ground to grow crops?

There are a lot of questions that I would love to have answers to. As I looked at the precise building of the settlement of Skara Brae, mirrored further down the road but in much bigger style at the Ness of Brodgar, understanding these lives seemed far out of reach. Because they left no recognisable records. May be the stone circles were all they felt would be needed? I sat for a while on a fallen stone in the Ring of Brodgar. I wanted to tune in. But today wasn’t the day. Too many people. Too much activity. Lots of layers of energy from all the people who have visited in the past. Now the highway is not so much a thin place as a well travelled road.

I love travelling to thin places. Where the highway seems to take me back to another time. Or sideways into a different dimension.

But I also feel that our thin places become less so when we enter them as unaware spectators. Not being mindful about the impact of our energy. I would like to sit in the Ring of Brognar under a full moon. Then I’m sure the energy would be more as it once was several thousand years ago. And I can journey to life as it once was on this highway. To be a ghost in their world. Looking in from the edges of their perception. I wonder what they would make of me? Or my time? And all of the traffic that now zooms up and down this Neolithic road.

As the wind tried to blow me off my feet I enjoyed the sudden fall of rain. It freshened the energy of the road. I felt that I was in two places at once. Here on the edge of the loch two lifetimes finally met in one moment. Another woman once walked this highway between her settlement and the standing stones. Whatever her purpose she felt the wind at her back and the rain in her face. One day, in her turn, there will be another woman who experiences these same feelings. In her future I hope she will wonder about all of the women who have walked the Neolithic highway. And remember that all of us are connected.

I am here because my mother was here. She was here because her mother had her.  In a line unbroken back to the settlements along this road. Orkney reminds us to keep on moving down the road.

Day 601 of my blogging challenge 

Armageddon- An Ending? Or Beginning?

I love when I can have a discussion that makes me think. Today it’s about Armageddon. Not one of my usual topics because I prefer to see human  behaviour as a continuum rather than good or evil. Yet Thin Places call for us to consider what we believe about this reality.

And whether some kind of Armageddon is about to happen. The biblical suggestions of this interesting word centre around the idea of a God who will rescue his believers from the oppression of their enemies. This God will arrange to smite all the baddies at some kind of major gathering of armies and kings. Only the true believers will be saved. Certain battles have already been claimed in ancient texts as Armageddon-like events. But there is one book of the New Testement in Christian bibles that goes into much greater detail about a battle to end all battles. And apparently that is still to come. The book of Reveleations is quite a revelation.

My wonderful friend Maura, a talented medium and guide to sacred places, reminded me of another prophecy. Within the works of Nostradamus there is said to be a suggestion of a third great Anti-Christ, possibly connected with the sound of trumpets, who brings about the war to end all wars. I know that reading the Nostradamus predictions can be hard work. And making sense of them even harder. Because we are looking back when he was looking forward. Much the same as John was doing when he recorded his vision or Revelation. So does this connection to trumpets predict that the current President of the United States will be responsible for a war that wipes out the world?

I have always been fascinated by the idea of Armageddon. Of an apocalyptic event that causes all of life as we currently know it to cease. That’s also been a strong thread within science fiction writing for the last 150 years.

But are we destined for destruction? Certainly all things end at some point. But usually because something new has taken it’s place. Where once there were at least three or more species of humanity we are now all one type. Are we the most efficient version of the human race? Possibly for now. Will we always be? Probably not. So change has to happen. Something has to tip the balance. I believe that what we are dealing with right now is that shift. Just as the Thin Places encourage us to rethink our understanding of time and space because they challenge our definitions of what is real I feel that the emotional energy now being expressed is a revelation too. There is a choice fast approaching.

How we respond to the reality of our inner human emotions will determine what we share as an outer experience. Armageddon may not be a time of aggressive destruction for power over and control of others. It may instead be the willing destruction of old, worn out ways of unequal living. A clearing of the ground so that we can build anew. Not a time to fear but an experience to welcome. Can we rise above the fear and approach these challenges with love and positivity? I know that letting go of old patterns is hard. So the time to start doing so is right now. I’m aware that I still have the capacity to be angry, frightened or overwhelemed. Made powerless by thinking that human nature can’t be changed.

Perhaps that will prove to be the case. But I’m going to work very hard to rise above these emotions. To do the best I can to hold a positive view of the possible outcomes. And to trust in a new world where destruction is gentle, powerful and leads to reconstruction.

Day 455 of my blogging challenge.

Sensing the Veil Between the Worlds

I’ve been chatting today about the veil between the worlds. Understanding the energy that divides us from each other and from other realities helps us to learn to cross backwards and forwards through that veil.

Because when I consider myself as an energy being I can understand more about the way I experience both the ebb and flow of all the other energies around me. So it starts with recognising my own energy. Then recognising the energy of other physical beings. Finally I can sense and understand the energy of the non-physical beings and places too. I can learn to cross the veil in some way so that I can communicate and experience other realms. Part of this sensing is also learning to pay attention to the Earth’s energy flows too. In a conversation with my good friend Mindie Burgoyne this evening we discussed the Thin Places. Areas on the planet where the veil is easier to cross.

There are lots of locations where energy recordings have been captured. Sometimes called the stone tapes theory it’s as if the events of a place are accessible every time I press the play button on the recorder. This is definitely one way to see beyond the veil that speparates us. Yet the recordings are just that. Repeatable certainly. But providing the same information over and over. There is no opportunity for me to interact. To move the information forward. It is what it is. And it can’t ever be anything more. What I do find interesting about these recordings is that they are often laid down by extremes of emotional energy. And sometimes because the place containing the recording is a high energy point.

That’s also what interests me about the veil places. To move between energy realities requires a lot of additional energy. I have to shift my rather slow human vibration up a level or two just to be able to sense a thin place. To engage with it takes even more of a shift.

It’s much easier to have this experience if I happen to be at a place where there are plenty of ley line connections. These energy lines grid the Earth. Some are extremely powerful. Especially if they are an energy node (a collection of powerful energy streams). Quite a few are damaged. And some have stopped transferring energy altogether. In such a place where the energy is strong it’s possible for most people to sense the veil. That sizzle of energy keeping one reality apart from another. And it’s also possible, if you wish to do so, to cross through the veil in some way. Many people have experiences where they feel they have stepped from one time into another. I know they have been able to sense an alternate reality.

In that other reality our Ego mind feels out of step. Perhaps even a bit threatened. The connection with our usual energy flow has altered. Yet the intuitive mind is, for once, able to process the energy of that place in interesting ways. I know that I have travelled back in time to interact with the Energy Beings of places where our ‘times’ overlap. I’ve also stepped into completely otherworld places to talk to Energy Beings from other planets. Or the Spirit World. Often I’m given guidance. Or knowledge. Even energy to bring back to my personal reality.

These Thin Places can expand our understanding of what human and Spirit life is about by encouraging us to access altered states of consciousness. To explore beyond the surface of life.

When I make energy connections on this side of the veil, or beyond it, I am open to being much more than a human being. I am exploring the Spirit within me from different realities. I’m not religious. I feel religion is something we have manufactured to keep ourselves small. But I do believe in Spirit. And that the Spirit within each of us is a spark of some Divine existence. Connecting all of these sparks on this and every other side of the veil, in every reality, is important to me. That way we become a cosmic oneness once more. Not the illusion of individuality that I currently sense in my physical body.

Have you tried stepping into your energy? Have you visited a Thin Place and travelled beyond the veil? I know that if you do you will understand the beauty of the energy you are. And the beauty of the energy ocean we all share. Once you connect to the vast possibilities of alternate realities I know you will take to heart the idea behind “what you give is what you get”. There is more you and I than we can know in this life unless we use our energy to approach the veil and find out. I know that we can change the world for the better with our combined positive energies. Let’s look at ourselves differently, approach the veil and allow our beautiful energy to flow.

Day 454 of my blogging challenge.