Miss Loved Ones? Ask Them For A Sign

miss feathersYesterday it was my Mum’s birthday. When I got up I wished her a happy birthday. But I knew I couldn’t take her a present as she has been in the Spirit World for many years now. She’s with other family members so I know they will have been celebrating her Earth anniversary. Yet I miss beings able to join in.

It’s not only on her birthday. There are other days when I’d love the chance to be with her. All of us would. But that isn’t possible in the same way it once was. We can’t pile round to her house for one of her famous dinners. The kind of meal that sends you to sleep afterwards. With lots of banter. And a great chance to check in with what everyone else is up to. So now I have to use my intuition to connect with my Mum. Looking out for her little signals that she is around. Trying not to miss a sign. Being open that there will be one even if my logical mid is dismissing it.

Because I believe that everyone is intuitive. And that, like me, everyone can connect with their loved ones. One way or another. The people we care about in Spirit want us to know they are still there. Because they still love us. And want to support us. So they try to get the message to us any way they can. When I miss anyone I like to find a quiet place to sit and ask in my head for them to talk to me. I might not hear anything. But perhaps I see a picture in my mind’s eye. Or feel like someone has put a hand on my shoulder. Sometimes I get a tune in my head. Or some words. Even if I miss the signs I can take comfort from that moment of thinking about my loved ones.

When you miss a loved one keep the lines of communication open. Be ready to acknowledge anything that seems like a sign. Your loved ones will keep trying to get your attention until you build up trust that it’s them. It doesn’t remove that ‘missing you’ feeling completely. But it certainly helps to know they are closer than you think.

Day 858 of my blogging challenge 

A Like Minded Community: Why Does It Matter?

like minded global communityOne of the things I often ask my Guides about is their insistence that the Spirit World is a like minded community. Surely there will be differences? It would be too perfect if there weren’t. How would the Spirit people progress otherwise? Is their world really so lacking in challenge?

Of course they enjoy debating this with me. I understand that we come here in order to experience the consequences of free will choice first hand. It’a the place where my Spirit gets to be a bit rebellious. It’s also the reality in which my Spirit experiences the limitations that free will choice can put on unconditional love. I know that we live in a world where love struggles to be the guiding force. Human emotions continually slide into the lower vibrational feelings. And then get denied, ignored or blocked out completely. I know how hard it is to look in my mirror and own my shadow side. The impact of that choice is a global community that is in bits. We are far from a like minded species.

When I’ve asked about this and the connection to the Spirit World we came from my Guides have always answered ‘Love’. They remind me that the community on the other side share a like minded understanding of unconditional love. Their sense of community is from recognising that only love matters. And also that each and every Spirit matters too. I was discussing this today with a really inspiring friend. I often forget that I matter. It’s part of my upbringing, my gender, my place in the structure of this world that I am conditioned to think that others matter more than me. I’ve been told all my life that my duty is to love others before I love myself. And if I do love myself then that love must be conditional.

It must be conditional because I don’t matter as much as the others on the planet. It’s funny how many like minded people I know who share that same wrong headed belief.

Because time and again my Guides have reminded me that I do matter. They have helped me to understand that by limiting my love for myself I am actually limiting the love I can give to others. No matter how much I do if I let that martyr lurk inside me then I will reduce my capacity to love the rest of the human race. To build a better community, at any level, I now understand that I have to recognise that I matter. Then I can open my heart to the idea that other people matter. Not just the like minded ones who limit themselves in the same way I do. But every single person on the planet.

That has been hard for me to grasp. How can I accept those who hurt and harm others in deliberate and clear ways? They are not like minded as far as I am concerned. What about the people who tell themselves they have to make hard decisions but their choices show that clearly, to them, some people don’t matter? Again, I would hope they are not like minded either. Yet if I am promoting unconditional love there is a point where I have to understand that they matter too. They are playing out the limited love they allow themselves. And the limited love they offer to others. Because a global community that acts from a flow of love is hard to achieve whilst we all sit in judgement on one another.

Ah, say my Guides, that is where like minded thinking begins. When I and others are ready to accept that everyone matters. And we stop limiting our love with judgements.

I know it is a big ask. I have spent many years learning that I matter. Challenging the inner dialogue that tells me I am not a good person. Or intelligent. Even that I’m not worthy. And a thousand other judgements that I have accepted or, worse still, applied to myself. It’s quite a struggle. yet it’s one I need to complete so that I can recognise more fully just how much other people matter too. So that I can grow my like minded community to include even more participants. I am sure that this is the way to change the global community. When we all realise the ‘I Matter – You Matter’ flow of energy there a a great chance that our young people will be able to love themselves unconditionally from the start of their lives.

That’s the biggest challenge of all. To help the next few generations turn the global community into a like minded one. Not by use of coercion or force. Or by preaching one single religious view. But through a deep understanding that every view matters and needs to be fully expressed. Then there are no hidden agendas, no secrets and no judgements. And I know we will be able to deal with even the most difficult views in a loving and compassionate way. After all, I know it works that way in the Spirit World so why not aim for the same here. Of course, I know my Guides would love us to need a new challenge. Because if, by our own free will, we acted as a community that cared for each member of that community then we wouldn’t be stretched enough.

Our Spirit Within needs to grow and evolve. I would love to have the opportunity of doing that within a community that came from the heart and recognised that everyone mattered. Think how creative humanity is. What wonders could we have if we became like minded and loving?

Day 824 of my blogging challenge

Progress Through Focus and Determination

progress in loveThis Mercury retrograde period has been really good for looking at my progress. Especially in a year where there has been so much change energy. It’s also been something I have been lucky enough to encourage my mentees to do.

One of the things I love best about mentoring is that I get to share someone else’s journey through a period of self-development and change. I can monitor the progress they are making. It gives me a chance to remind the person how much they have actually achieved. Because when we are making changes it can sometimes be hard to see how we are different. And what has been achieved. Today I’ve had the chance to discuss with several mentees how brilliantly they are doing. I have been able to point out their determination to make their lives different. And the focus they have brought to getting nearer their goals.

I feel that all too often we ignore our progress. Certainly I do. I drift into looking at what hasn’t changed yet, instead of what has.  But I am learning to recognise what I have done differently, where I have grown and how positive I can feel about more changes. Because I want to keep going towards my dreams. Even if I have to keep changing what, when, where and how I do the things in my life. So sharing the successes of my mentees gives both of us a renewed sense of more progress to come. I’m really excited that anyone who sticks at it, understands the need for self-discipline and takes responsibility for themselves can achieve everything they want. And I am fortunate to be working with people who have decided to do just that.

Progress is what brings me back to the service I do for the Spirit World. They are already in a place where progress is a natural party of their community approach. Each one aligned to the results of what they doing being a part of the greater good. I know that my mentees will contribute so much more than they imagine at this present moment. Our community down here will benefit so much. Here’s a big shout out to everyone determined and focused on growing and contributing their best!

Day 749 of my blogging challenge

Collaborate! Great Things Can Be Achieved

collaborateI’m writing at the end of a long day of connecting. In all sorts of ways. Always following the desire to collaborate because i know great things can happen when I do.

It started with an interesting discussion during a mentoring session. It seemed that the Guides wanted me to notice how much can be improved if I collaborate. Yet there is sometimes a feeling that this is a bad or wrong word. During a Spirit message the theme posed up again. Then later, as I sat chatting to a friend, guess what – in came the word collaborate again. To put it another way my Guides were reminding me to share. Share the journey, the pitfalls, the success and, most of all, share the love. This evening I did a demonstration of mediumship at a lovely centre. It was wonderful to experience Spirit people collaborating with me to get messages to the people here that they love.

That’s the biggest reward for me. That I’ve passed on what someone needs to hear and know. It feels like, for a few moments, I have been allowed to be a part of the Spirit World too. Because they act as a collaboration. The Spirit community is based on loving kindness and unconditional service to one another. That bit is easy to forget in the excitement of giving evidence and making connections. So when the Spirit people step in to connect with me I know they appreciate that I collaborate in passing on what they give me. Exactly what they give me. No more and no less. It helps me to understand how I can share with everyone who comes into my life. If they wish me to.

That’s the important point. To collaborate takes more than one person. Yet if two of us do share the energy generated is of pure love. We give each other a little gift of something. And that something can inspire, support and sustain both of us. How marvellous if whole communities could collaborate and share for the good of all. Impossible? I know we can do it if we decide to set it as a goal and act accordingly.

Day 715 of my blogging challenge

What Joins Us Together : What Pushes Us Apart

TogetherIt’s been a day of reflection. Listening to the Spirit World talk about what joins us together. And how we somehow manage to push ourselves apart. How can bonds and ties stay strong?

It’s always lovely to hear of friendships that have been life long. Or relationships that are celebrating a 40th or 50th anniversary. To notice that family members have stuck together, one way or another, as the children have grown into middle or old age. These bonds have stood the test of life and time. They have been flexible yet strong enough to weather all kinds of storms. As I listened to the conversations today I thought about how we stick together. And what can drive us apart. I wondered what my loved ones in Spirit would say. After all, they have shown me quite clearly that they are still linked to me with ties of love.

I had an Open Circle tonight. What came through very clearly from all of the messages was the love. Each communicator giving the evidence that their love for us is as strong and lasting as ever. Reminding me that the most important thing I can do is love my family and friends as much as possible. Especially during the times when we might be getting pushed apart. Because together we are stronger. The community in Spirit know that. They come here to remind us of that as often as possible. During all those times when earthly things threaten to separate us. When we pick sides. Or judge. Even when we get angry or upset at each other. When we want more than others. Or more than others can give. Love can keep the lines of communication open. Love for ourselves and love for each other.

I’m often inspired to talk about the community of Spirit. When we are all together and let the loved ones in the Spirit World join with us.

They help us to create a community that crosses time, space and dimensions. They are willing to share with us their love, healing, wisdom and knowledge. I know that they show us how we can be joined together in this way by our ties of love. They want us to notice how easy it is to create that shared community. And I know that they want us to realise that it is easy to create a global human community based on the same love principle. I’ve listened to people saying that world peace is hard. That it can’t happen. Even that our differences are too great to overcome. The Spirit people wouldn’t agree. To them it’s all about love.

If I can overcome what pushes me apart from my family, friends and community then surely we all can? If I can see each person as a unique human being and share the love with them then can’t all of us? I know it sounds so simple that many people would say it’s naive. However I believe it’s possible for all of us to learn to share the love. We only have to want to enough. I see that as the problem. Perhaps we don’t really want to set aside our differences and look for the similarities. Otherwise we would all be speaking out about the awful things that are happening to other people. Rather than having that secret feeling of ‘thank goodness it’s not me’. Or that even worse state of not even noticing or caring because ‘I’m alright’.

Keeping humanity together is all about love. I’m learning to love myself and those around me no matter what we disagree on. I want to stick with my community because I know it will make me and the community stronger. I hope you can resist the urge to see your community pushed apart. Let love show you the way.

Day 690 of my blogging challenge 

Approaching Death: The Spirit Viewpoint

Birth and deathI had a conversation about death today. It might seem slightly odd to start my blog that way, as my life is full of conversations about death. However, this one was about the way that the Spirit approaches death.

Being human is about being born and then dying. The span in between is life. Forgive me for stating the obvious but I feel we often forget that an ending is inevitable. And when our loved ones pass to the Spirit World we are bereft. Because of our love for them. But what about death when there has been a short span of life? Or hardly any living involved? Is it the same as a death when life has been long, full, fulfilled? What does the Spirit inside every one of us think or feel about passing out of this physical body? And can that help us to understand the process of living and dying any better?

Good questions, I thought, when it came up today. So I remembered the discussion I had with my Guides about death. From a Spirit point of view I came into this physical body with agreed start and end dates. I also sorted out the life experiences I wanted to try and a whole range of options to choose from. I did this to make the most of the time I had agreed to spend here. Because I understood that my life as a human was a visit. My consciousness would continue to exsist (and had been there before) long after I, the human, passed away. To the Spirit every life, however brief or long, is an experience that promotes growth. Since each life is different the I that is my Spirit has an opportunity to try all sorts of different things.

So each time I have another death I am really going back to my former, Spirit, life. I’m taking my place back in the eternity of existence that my Spirit experiences.

The I that is the Spirit me hasn’t ended. Instead I have a whole new set of experiences to think about, understand and contribute to the community I live with. Our Group Soul. Those other Spirits who are also busy being born and dying alongside of me. Every person I meet in my human life is part of that greater community. I believe that we have agreed to connect with one another here in a physical existence so that we can all understand what it’s like to live with love that is conditional. And to return to the place where love is unconditional as wiser Spirits who value love more highly than before.

That helps me to understand that death is something my Spirit looks forward to. And no matter how much life I have experienced my Spirit values every single moment. Just as my Spirit values every single moment of life that has been given to all of those other Spirit/Humans who have shared my life. In the end, my Spirit welcomes death as the completion of an adventure. A journey ended. Knowledge obtained and to be taken back to share. I love the idea of returning to contribute experiences and discuss them. To think up new questions to be answered by the next life’s experiences. My Spirit embraces the planning of the new life. Of setting the length of time.

In fact, my Spirit sees dying as a natural move forward. Even if my human me doesn’t quite get that yet. It’s time for me to appreciate that death is just another one of those experiences I came here to try.

Day 669 of my blogging challenge 

Daddy’s Girl: Ten Years of Missing Memories

daddy's girlDaddy’s girl! My Dad has been in the Spirit World ten years today. There are lots of days when I don’t immediately remember that he and Mum are gone.

But at some moment in every day I notice that they aren’t around. It’s like a sort of ‘oh, yes’ in my head when I am on the point of picking up the phone to call them with my problems. Because that’s what I really notice now. There is no back up. I don’t have them as a sounding board when I’m in my stressy head moments. I miss their wisdom. Even if I didn’t always agree with it. It was hard for me to be a Daddy’s girl and then to have to join the tribe of women. Underneath I feel I was always trying to impress my Dad. Even when I needed the influence of my Mum and other women. I do know I pushed hard against my Mum. And equally hard against my Dad. That’s what teenagers do.

As I made that transition from child to adult they gave me space to do it. And were there to help me pick up the pieces afterwards. Yet for the last ten years I have no memories of my Dad. We didn’t have time to make any new ones. He hasn’t seen my child grow up. Or been able to influence her life by his presence. I so wish she could have shared some of the magic I had as Daddy’s girl. Because I am sure she would have become a grandad’s girl too. There is sadness when I think of the missed memories. Yet I also know that he has another life now. He is in the Spirit World with my Mum. They both keep an eye on me and help me when they can. That’s a comfort.

Not quiet as good as being able to sit round the table with them down here. But something Is always better than nothing. I’ll still be Daddy’s girl no matter how old I get. So I’m looking forward to that time, when I eventually return to the Spirit World, were we can make more memories together. Love you Dad ❤️

Day 667 of my blogging challenge

Sunshine, Handfasting, Making a Commitment

HandfastingThe sun is shining. I’m glad. It’s my pleasure to be conducting a handfasting this afternoon. How wonderful to be part of the process of making a commitment.

I always enjoy representing the Spirit World. One of the ways they ask me to serve is to be the speaker at wedding, handfasting or commitment ceremonies. When two people decide that they want to share a life together in the energy of love the Spirit World rejoices. Because they have found the true way to connect to one another. I know that making any commitment represents the underlying energy of love. Loving myself and others enough to make a pledge of some sort. An agreement. A bargain. And I also know that it’s not a step taken lightly. I struggle when I break a promise. That’s why I try to make only those I am sure I can keep. However, I’m also a realist enough to know that love is conditional on the Earth plane. And some promises do get broken.

It’s how I handle the broken promises that matters. And how I make myself better in keeping to my commitments. That’s why the tradition of handfasting arose as a commitment that could be entered into for a defined period of time. After that period the couple could end the vow or choose to continue for another spell. I’m always delighted if a couple know they want to enter a permanent handfasting. It means I am working with people who value the love they share and have reached a place of total certainty. Because life is unpredictable. So I know it takes a lot to pledge to something for the rest of your life in spite of ups and downs.

This afternoon as I wind and tie the cord to bind them the energy of that commitment will echo up to the Spirit World. Where their loved ones will be celebrating the love too. And I will be reminding myself to commit to loving me more too. So that I can make that loving commitment out into the wider world ❤️

Day 663 of my blogging challenge

Spiritualism: Still Alive and Kicking?

Spiritualism. Is it still alive in a modern world? It’s been a pleasure to visit Free Spirit Centre in Blackpool this evening. I was there to do the demonstration of mediumship.

In other words to pass on messages from Spirit people. The ability to communicate with Spirit people and give those messages is at the heart of Spiritualism. When I first started to question the idea that non-physical beings might be connecting with us I did a lot of reading about the history of what is now called Spiritualism. I wanted to understand how this idea had emerged and even why if I could. This was some time before I started to have contact with Spirit people myself. It seemed to be a natural phenomena that got entangled with religious views. Talking to Spirits became Spiritualism and, very confusingly, Theosophy too.

It seemed that the discovery of a way to communicate polarised the religious views of most people of the time. Both Western and Eastern traditions became wrapped around the idea of talking to people who were dead but Spirits in another world. It’s as if there needed to be a concept of God so that what was happening could be understood. Yet that idea of God and Spirits doesn’t have to go hand in hand. I believe that what we are using is a natural ability that puts us in touch with other Energy Beings of all sorts. That’s why I prefer to think of Spirit communication as part of our spirituality.

So where does this leave Spiritualism? One end of the spectrum of views about Spirit contact? Or part of a much expanded spiritual movement?

In all of my visits to churches, centres, groups and events the Spirit people have come to talk to me. No matter what religious views the people hosting my demonstration held. It seems that Spiritualism has no requirement to be a religion. In fact I would argue that modern Spiritualism is a spirituality instead. A concept or model that holds communication with Spirits at the heart of what it is. A set of values encouraged by Spirit communicators. Where we all find our own inner route to an understanding of a Divine, a Source, an integral connection between all of us. Or whatever else you want to call it.

Whilst it can be entertaining, after a fashion, Spiritualism isn’t purely for laughs or making money. I believe it’s about sharing a great secret. The realisation that there is something after death. A new life. With new choices and experiences. An existence where being of service has more value than anything material. When we get to that secret, hidden in plain sight, I feel we are being asked to consider the ways in which we live here on Earth. And being prompted to try to do better. Not from any religious point of view. That is because Gods etc command or demand it. But purely because it is a step into understanding how to serve each other.

The big step is to take religion out of the communication with Spirits. Spiritualism as a path of Spirituality.

But with the clear understanding that there is room for all kinds of religious belief within this new form of Spiritualism. That the movement we call Spiritualism is one of greater self-awareness. Achieved through communication with those who step forward from the Spirit World. With the commitment to live a spiritual life. Because I can’t see how I can square talking about spirituality without doing the actions that support what I say. That’s why I have always gone where I have been invited. Spirit communication is not something that I practice only with a narrow focus. Or to boost my ego. Nor for monetary gain.

I would argue that Spiritualism is alive and kicking. The contact from the Spirit World is growing. More and more people are making use of their intuitive abilities. Finding and using the inner guidance they are receiving. Our task is to shift the understanding of Spiritualism out of the Victorian era into a modern interpretation. I know this won’t sit well with some. But until we offer an up to date, straightforward view of what we practice this spiritual path remains hidden to most people. And that’s the real shame. Spiritualism has changed my life. For the better. I would like it to be the change in other people’s lives as well.

The Spirit World is giving a shout out to all churches, centres, groups and circles to check what they are doing. Are you putting your money where your mouth is? Or has ego, profit and exclusivness driven out the voice of Spirit? It’s time to define Spiritualism for the next next one hundred and fifty years.

Day 588 of my blogging challenge 

A Human Transitions Back To Spirit

I traveled out to Bacup today to take a church service. My job is to relay the messages from those who no longer live in a human body. They have made the biggest change of all. Back into Spirit.

It’s a job I’ve done for a long time. I often think I’ve covered everything there is to know about death and the Afterlife. Yet every now and then the Spirit World reminds me of the amazing process that transition can be. In the move from being human to being Spirit again how much love and compassion there is. Because today there were some lovely examples of the continuation of our exsistance and one very wonderful message of hope. I’ve written before about my evidence based mediumship. I want the person getting the message to feel or sense the presence of their Spirit loved one. That is greatly helped by factual information that I can be given that I would be unable to get in any other way.

During the messages this afternoon there was plenty of fact passed on through me. Confirmations that someone other than me was present. But to get that sense of presence  I also want the messages to be relevant to the listener. Loved ones come back to help. To give us a positive boost. To get us laughing and even hopeful again. I know they can’t take away the grief of their leaving. But they certainly want to remind us that they haven’t gone for good. So sometimes it’s also important to explain how they made the transition to the Afterlife. Giving information about their death or what happened afterwards helps to confirm that they have crossed over successfully. It sets minds at rest on this human side of life.

It’s also true that in the Afterlife they keep their human personality. That way when they message us we can recognise them. But they have returned to their true Spirit self as well.

Today I saw both aspects of that transition. There was a message from a very recently passed Spirit who came in his human self to ask that his family be reassured that he is safe with loved ones in Spirit. He told who collected him and helped him cross. He also asked that his loved ones here be supported in their grief. And he provided comfort to others by showing that loved ones survive that great transition. Now matter how challenging it may appear to be to us. From our human perspective. Along side him and helping him was another Spirit known to some of the congregation. The second Spirit explained that the energy around the first one required a booster. The second Spirit was the boost.

Although both Spirits were complete strangers to one another they shared a common link with people in the church. Much to the delight of those who it mattered to both Spirits had joined forces to bring in their messages of love. Especially the second Spirit. This one came as a pure Spirit being. One who had been human but was now through the completed transition process and fully back connected to the Afterlife. One who could let the human personality go and move on to do the work required in the Afterlife. My Guides tell me there is always a great sense of achievement when a Spirit completely lets go of their need to be human any longer. Because it is a new beginning. A fresh start. I know my Mum made that transition in order to be one of my Guides. That doesn’t mean I’ve lost her human side. She can pick it back up again if she has to.

However, I also get the benefit of the unconditional love she radiates as a Spirit. That helps me so much. Human aspect or Spirit aspect, our loved ones have made a tremendous change. One we have to make. But one that, when it comes, will be a joyful new beginning for our Spirit.

Day 580 of my blogging challenge