One of the things I’ve learned is about keeping a distance between me and any drama. It’s taken some years for me to step out of getting involved. To remind myself that the energy of negativity creates emotional chaos.
And to remove myself from any emotional involvement that disturbs my balance. I can’t say I’m completely there with this discipline yet. But I’m much better than I used to be. I feel it’s easy, especially as I am intuitively aware, to get involved in the negativity of other people. Especially if I over-sense their energy. The healer and nurturer in me switches on. I want to save the day by rescuing everyone and making it all come out well. Learning to operate at an emotional distance has been hard. I seem to have come in hard wired to gather everyone under my wings.
Add to that a healthy dollop of responsibility that goes with being the eldest child and it’s no wonder I played the peacemaker so often. Unfortunately it took me a long time to work out that diplomats also get the blame for outcomes too. Because you can’t please all of the people all of the time. A hard lesson for me to learn. One that often ended up with me being judged by all sides. And found wanting by all sides. So imagine how complicated it makes it when I know how everyone is really feeling. They might smile and talk positively. But I know the truth underneath. And there is nothing I can do about that.
Mainly because most people are still operating behind polite masks. They distance themselves from their true feelings. And have to make all sorts of complicated manoeuvres to feel comfortable creating drama.
At times that has frustrated or bored me. Or annoyed and upset me. Stepping out of the drama was hard when I felt I was supposed to justify myself. Yet another thing I’ve learned though is no matter what I say I’m talking to closed ears. People drive things on the way they feel they should go. Or try to manipulate the outcomes to fit their own agendas. So over the past few years I have stood back from situations as much as possible. I like to observe what people do rather than listen to what they say. I also step aside from as much negative energy as I can. A toxic environment is no good for anyone who is on a positive journey.
That’s the real reason to distance myself from drama. I prefer to flow in positive energy. It makes my connections to Energy Beings much stronger. It also means I can share positive energy and beam it out to anyone who might need a boost. The recipients don’t need to know I’m doing that. Hopefully they will feel a little bit better about their life or situation. And want to do something positive to change their outlook too. I’ve also tried to stop,creating my own drama too. I’ve stopped hanging on to things that need to be let go. Walking away from people and situations that create negative feelings in me. Knowing that I choose not to have those feelings.
Drama and turmoil is a life choice. I’ve learned that no one creates my drama for me. Putting the distance between me and my drama as well as the drama created by others has created a peaceful flow to my life. Since I want to keep my life this way I will be carrying on stepping into the distance.
Day 435 of my blogging challenge.
We are coming to the end of five years where the energy has been all about facing our fears. Bit by bit we have been asked to look at what we worry about most in our lives. It’s been an inner journey so that we can eventually produce an outer change.
For some time I’ve been picking up the incoming energy feed. I know that there is going to be another great shift in 2017. In the transition from old patterns into a new global community of humanity there is a lot of stuckness to be recognised and faced head on. Holding my inner self steady as I’ve worked through my fears has been a balancing act. One where I have wobbled a lot. Because letting the fears surface and be dealt with is hard. I have buried some so deep it’s been like a mining expedition to get them to the surface. Yet they have to be released from me. Otherwise I will be caught in the same old same old when the new energy hits.
I don’t want to miss out on any opportunities that are coming my way. I certainly don’t want to have to wait for them to come around again. So I’ve been focused on exploring my inner world for the past five years. It’s certainly been a revelation. I never quite understood how much of my behaviour was conditioned or limited by others. It seems I wasn’t used to letting other peoples opinions of me matter far too much. No wonder I found at times that I was surrounded by judgements, negativity or controlling behaviour. So it’s been a challenge for me to recognise I manifested that into my life.
I know we all want to feel like we belong. Sometimes we want to belong so much that we find ourselves trying to keep others happy at our own expense. Inner happiness can be hard to accept in a world where what seems to matter is outward appearance.
Yet the last five years have been all about noticing my outward world. Then working out if it reflects my inner world. Of course, when I realised it didn’t match what I wished for myself I was on notice that I had to change. Perhaps not outwardly at first. But I had to find ways of doing things differently. Manifesting or the law of attraction or cosmic ordering. They all follow the same universal rule of cause and effect. Or, as I like to put it, what you give out you get back. I’ve finally stopped rescuing people or situations. I make a point of treating myself well and putting my needs first. Being open to receive I expect nothing but the flow of abundance. In being ready to receive, and doing so at every opportunity, my inner world is all about being loving and compassionate to myself.
As I’ve learned, if I am able to feel that way inside then I am genuinely able to give that same energy out to others. In 2017 I expect to receive so much. But the best part of that is it means I will be able to give so much more outwardly. My inner and outer worlds will balance. However, I’m still a work in progress. I haven’t got the balance yet. This morning I was sitting having one of my ‘weekend’ days. Time for me not work. But there was still a niggle in the back of my mind. A list of all the things I still had to do. A sense that I ought to rush into work and do them. Never mind the 10 or 12 hour days from the previous week. Get the work done.
I resisted that urge. It was time to hold out for a day that gave me a chance to relax. So I met some friends for coffee and enjoyed much needed down time.
Resisiting the pull of work – the fear of leaving things undone – reminded me how far I have progressed. There are still some strong energy waves to come in this year. They will be surfacing more fears and stuck patterns. For all of us. World events reflect this too. Whilst we are being shaken loose of our fears there will be a lot of negativity around. I’m focused on holding the balance within myself. If I remain positive within then I can help that energy to manifest in my outer world too. Whatever fear arises we can all contribute to a fearless outcome. When you pay attention to your inner world you will be doing the best thing you can to ensure that you are living in a positive outer world. Go gently through the remainder of 2016 ?
Day 339 of my blogging challenge.