The Next Job In Front Of Me

The waves of energy continue. My job today was to work through a tide of depression. Only a tiny bit of it was mine. The rest was all the background emotions generated by the massive changes we are experiencing.

Even if I wasn’t sensitive to energy I’d be unlikely to miss the waves of feeling that have been crashing over all of us for some time now. The fact that I am connected into the energy can make it a bit more of a challenge when a tidal wave rushes over me. Since mid way through yesterday I have been noticing the depression energy. I picked it up in myself. It was also very noticeable in the people I met and my social media contacts. It had got so heavy that by this morning I was struggling. I had a job or three to do but felt flat in my energy.

I sat down to meditate about my energy levels. My Guides very kindly rustled up some extra energy to help me. They also pushed me to recognise and acknowledge my own feeling of depression. There is a point when I am going through big changes that my energy gives out. The next job seems like too much effort. Especially as it seems as if I’m not actually getting anywhere. Then I start to focus on the fact that my world has changed. Whether I wanted it to or not. And I can’t go back to where I was before. Like a first experience of death. Or the ending of a first relationship. Even making a change for a better job. It’s not about whether I can control the change or not. It’s that I can only go forward.

I thought about the changes that are appearing on a global scale. There is so much uncertainty. It’s been going on a long time. No wonder people are feeling the depression.

For some people it certainly might have echos of the 1930’s. The period called the Great Depression. The impact of that period of uncertainty led to another World War, fear and anxiety about survival. There are certainly events happening at the moment that appear to be bringing out the worst in people. Looking back people fear that the same thing is going to happen again. Yet there is a difference. If I can accept that my feeling of depression is part of the process of change I can also allow myself to release that feeling. Depression is based on the suppression of feelings. Refusing to allow myself to feel uncertain, scared or worried. Even angry that I can’t have what I had before. My first job is to let myself have those feelings.

If I shine a light on myself, tell myself it’s ok to feel that way and to find ways of releasing what is there then I’m creating a way forward. A way to keep doing the next job in front of me. Until I get past the uncertainty of change and my world settles down once more. That’s what I’ve done today. One job after another. Not thinking or planning for tomorrow, next week or next year. Working through what I had lined up for myself today. Doing something rather than nothing. Keeping the forward momentum going. And forgiving myself for not having enough energy to do all of the jobs I planned. I realise that doing the important things matters. The rest can wait for an energy filled day.

Day 480 of my blogging challenge.