Heavy Energy: Fear Is Not The Answer

heavy energyI know we live in challenging times. We are trying to bring about deep and fundamental changes to the ways we relate to one another. Yet I can’t escape the heavy energy that is around at the moment. It’s like the worst sci-fi story of nuclear war ever. And I am living in it. But fear is limiting other choices.

I’m not denying fear as an emotion. It is a useful energy to get adrenalin to kick in when we have to run away from large animals. Or when it’s dark and uncomfortable so we need to move to a different place. However, I find all the discussions about solving the issues the world faces come from a deeper place of fear. An ego place. A place where the energy is so heavy it’s almost solid. Somehow, in this place, I even fear my own destruction. Yet I have had years of evidence that life continues. In me if I am reincarnated. In others because there are plenty of children being born into the world.

This heavy fear is really my Ego Mind. Stirring me up. But limiting my options at the same time. Because when I act from a place of fear I only do what relives that fear. Temporarily. Because the heavy energy remains. And I sink down into it once more. So what am I to do when I hear all of the aggressive dialogue? It sounds like a script. A discussion with too many agendas hidden behind the scenes. And unfortunately not enough love to go around. When people become disposable objects it is easy to forget that they have a right to share the same planet. Even to remove them if they stand in the way of those agendas.

I wonder if the world leaders ever rise above the heavy energy of fear? Ever consider that what you give out you get back? And that, thus far, no one has lived forever? It’s no surprise that these issues are also apparent at a local and national level too. Fear is not an answer. Open, honest and clear discussion is. It’s time to put the guns and bombs away and start talking. Not through fear. But out of love.

Day 868 of my blogging challenge

Active Meditation: Body, Mind, Feelings & Spirit

Active feetI love walking in the forest or through woodland. It’s great to be active. I’ve also learned it’s a great way to meditate. To let my thoughts and feelings emerge. And to open up a conversation with the bits of me that are often hidden behind the activities of the material world.

I have to confess that it took me a long time to get used to meditating. My Ego Mind was a bit too keen to stay in control. Learning to step out of those active thoughts, to still myself, was a bit of a challenge. So was sitting still. I think I must have been a natural twitcher. My body would protest if stuck in one pose too long. It was a distraction. And one my Ego Mind used against me. Until I discovered active meditations. There is a long shamanic tradition of entering an altered state of consciousness through movement. Sometimes repetitive movement, like Sufi spinning or tribal drumming, or random movement like dancing.

Discovering these forms of active meditation made my life so much easier. Because I began to walk my meditations. I would pace through a guided piece, letting it play through my headphones or on my CD player, focusing on the actions being in rhythm with the words or music. Round and round the room I would stride. Letting myself feel the movement in my physical body. Opening up to the feelings that would arise. Noticing the thoughts and where they connected with the guided piece. Eventually I noticed another me. One that would peep out at me from time to time. A me who wanted to walk alongside the physical me. So I invited her to join me. At that point my meditative space became quite crowded.

There were others with me. All wanting to take part in my active meditation because they had been trying to connect with me for a long time.

They helped me by taking my walking outside my house. I have always enjoyed walking so they encouraged me to get back in my long distance groove again. When I did I found that I could drop into that state of meditation very easily. I didn’t need to be guided by music or a CD. All I had to do was focus my attention on each step, each breath and each surge of forward energy. To help me I would try to notice everything around me. But without specifically focusing on any one object. If I am in a woodland it feels as if the trees form a protection around me and the everyday world withdraws. I am sheltered and often in half light. It feels like a return to the womb.

On the beach I feel the pull of the air and a sense of vast space. The waves make a backdrop to the waves of my thoughts. And it doesn’t matter if my thoughts are active. I let them bubble to the surface without challenge. Stream of consciousness ideas flowing and inspiring me. It’s an easy way to tell which are mine and the thoughts that belong to Energy Beings. Because wherever I am walking my aim is to receive the intuitive messages that are waiting for my attention. If I take active notice of the intuitive information then I boost my connections to the non physical world. Exactly what I want to be able to do in my life. That information had helped me to live a more spiritual and peaceful life.

When I am active in my meditations it’s as if I can achieve a perfect balance of body, mind, feelings and Spirit. My whole being is involved. And that includes my intuitive sense too. I am complete.

Finally, I hope that I have inspired you to give walking meditation a go. Even on the shortest walk you can open up a space for your Spirit self to speak to you. Why not give it a try?

Day 862 of my blogging challenge

Shutting Up Internal Chatter: Listening For Guides

shutting up chatterIt must be a necessary theme this week – working with Guides. Yesterday I wrote about my latest new Guide and today I’ve been chatting to several people about the way I work with mine. Explaining that our connection couldn’t get off the ground until I learned about shutting up my internal chatter.

As a human being I have learned to keep my mind active. Not necessarily by choice. But because I have always been expected to process lots of information. Firstly by my Ego Mind so that I can keep myself out of danger and stay alive as long as possible. The chatter that flows through in my thoughts has a big chunk of assumptions, options and debates about what to do for the best. Not only about crossing a road or driving. But also how much my gas bill is, the price of food and if that person really did mean to be nasty to me. The Ego Mind is expecting uncertainty and attack. Shutting it down completely is hard because I want to stay safe too. So it gently rumbles on yacking at me all the time.

Also chatting away are my feelings. Who said what, when and why. Debating if I feel hurt, proud, upset or angry. Linking what has been said to things in my past and dredging up old feelings. Chattering about assumptions of what is going to happen in the future if I have to speak to that person again. Going round and round judgements, conversation points and individual words. Constructing my answers for next time. Or the things I really wished I had said. I play these over and over again in the safety of my internal world hoping that I can deny them or reinvent them to sound more positive to me. Using up lots of energy keeping myself in the past rather than accepting the conversations and moving on. And all because humans don’t show each other how to deal with feelings immediately.

Shutting up chatter therefore becomes a lot more complicated as I fall into all of these internal dialogues. Swapping Ego Mind with feelings endlessly. So how can my Guides break through that noise?

It’s important to acknowledge that my Guides communicate with my Intuitive Mind. The part of me that processes the information from my intuitive senses. It’s a part of me that has been pushed into he background. I’ve been trained to believe that I actually don’t have intuitive senses. So how can the information break through if I’m not even paying attention? My Intuitive Mind is chattering very quietly to itself. Gradually shutting down the information coming in because all the other chatter is drowning it out. Until it’s almost silent. I’ve even forgotten that it’s there. Unless I get a random prediction right. Or have a moment of deja vu that wobbles my certainty in the material world. Even denying that I might have seen a non-physical being.

So here I am with far too much chatter going on in my head. Yet the voices or connections I want to experience are shutting up. In my experience the only way to deal with this was to start closing down the chatter and opening my intuition. I began with learning to meditate. Letting myself turn down the volume on my Ego and feelings. But turning up the volume on my intuitive senses. I also learned to sit very quietly so that the chatter could calm down, slow down and fade a bit. Music for relaxation helped me too. I started to write my questions down and let myself answer them. I paid attention to any thoughts and feeling I had that seemed not to be mine. And I kept asking for more. telling my Guides to give me the information again.

With a lot of practice I gradually learned how effective shutting down the chatter could be. Because I had a space in my head where other impressions, thoughts and feelings could emerge. It took me some time to trust that this was my Guides communicating with me. Yet when I finally accepted it was my mind chatter became a wonderful, purposeful conversation instead. Is it time for you to stop chattering and start listening?

Day 855 of my blogging challenge

Confirming Three Times: Is This The Best Way Forward?

confirmingThere have been times in my life when I have had choices and not known which way to go forward. A bit like me being at a roundabout and looking for the right road to my destination. Until I connected with my Guide Team I would stumble forward. In a sort of hit and miss way I would get to somewhere. But now I have a better way. My team are happy confirming if my choice will suit me. So long as I have made a choice!

It has helped me a lot. Confirming my direction, once I have taken a first step, allows me to  go forward with confidence. Of course they leave the decision up to me. After all there are always many roads to the top of a mountain. And many down the other side too. But when I choose a route my Guides will let me know if it’s going to be an easy one or not. However, a habit I developed when I began working with my Guides has stuck with me. I like them to confirm important directions three times in three different ways. In this way I can listen to my intuition, do what I feel is the right thing and then make sure I have done the best I can.

I don’t do this with everything in my life. There are decisions I can easily make for myself. That’s part of being responsible for myself. However, every now and again I come to a point where there are options and the way ahead is a bit foggy. Once again I like that my Guide team, by confirming what I am debating, help and inspire me to my choices. Like little nudges that get me looking at things from a higher perspective. And checking that I am not getting lost in my Ego Mind. After all, I want to live by my spiritual beliefs and to do that I have to be in my Intuitive Mind. I want to come from a place of compassion and honesty in my dealings with the world. So sometimes my choices surprise people. I will gladly explain them if I am asked.

Actually, my blog is a way of making my choices transparent. So often when I sit down to write it it turns out to be a confirmation that a decision was the best one in the circumstances. Or I get a chance to argue with myself over which path to take. And in behind it all the time are my Guide Team, confirming the pros and cons, dropping debating points into my mind and reassuring me that I don’t have to worry about unexpected outcomes. I am a Spirit in a human body doing the best I can.

Day 850 of my blogging challenge

Assisting Each Other: Setting Aside Ego

assistingOne of the best things about meeting up with my friend and colleague Diane is that we can chat about anything. And we do chat about everything. But best of all I find it brilliant that we are assisting each other to understand our lives and our work better.

Like me Diane is also a teacher of mediumship. We have both been working with people for a long time to help them access and use their intuition. So I know we both enjoy sharing and bouncing ideas off one another. What I also like is that we always meet as equals. Neither of us has any concern that one or other is superior or inferior. We come to our work from different backgrounds, with different life experiences and through different training. Yet we both recognise we are assisting each other when we start to talk. And that also opens the door to both of our Guide Teams. It’s really refreshing to have a wider debate because both of our teams have helped us to step past the Ego Mind mine field.

I know how easy it is to drop into comparisons. To judge myself by comparing myself to others. My Guide team have been assisting me for a long time in making sure that I take myself into my Intuitive Mind as much as possible. And that I allow my own abilities to present themselves without me deciding whether they are good or not. They work on the ‘good enough’ basis. And remind me that I’m often too close in the experience to decide if I am ‘good enough’ or not. So also having someone to discuss things with is like another back up to keep me in the intuitive flow. It’s also really refreshing for me to recognise that we have both had very similar experiences of mediumship. That there seem to be some ‘givens’ to intuitive work.

Working together, assisting one another, talking it all through, we reach conclusions that are fresh inspirations. I always come away with a head full of ideas. Refreshed and ready to get back to my work. Inspired. Who do you talk to? Can you both have a conversation together from an inner intuitive place? And if you aren’t yet talking to anyone, is it time to find that person who will share, discuss and work with you equally as much as you work with them?

Day 840 of my blogging challenge

Debating What To Do For The Best

debatingI love debating all sorts of things. It’s something I’ve done all of my life. Probably part of the reason why I procrastinate too. Because I want to hear all sides of the debate. And seek out a clear understanding of the issues. Since my Guides stepped in I also want to hear their take on it too.

I suppose one of the biggest surprises that I got when I started to communicate with my Guides was that they can’t tell me what to do. I have to use my own free will. To the best of my ability. In order that I arrive at a course of action that comes from my heart and ethics. I have to say I debated that with them for a long time. Surely, I thought, they were there to help me get things right? But I soon came to understand that debating the best course of action for me was so that I would make the choice. And be responsible for the consequences of that choice. Even if I had to learn a lesson by making a choice with consequences that affected other people in a way I didn’t like.

What mattered, they explained, was that the debating should happen. That I should think very carefully about every thought, word and action. To check that it was the best I could do, in the circumstances as I understood them. If there were unexpected consequences, which there usually are, I would consider more carefully next time. And if there were consequences I could see but ignored, once again, I could make a better decision next time. I’ve stuck with this now for many years. In fact I know my Guides were trying to help my debating long before we had regular communication. They helped me to try to work out my ethics. My rules for living.

Debating is only useful if it encompasses feelings, thoughts and beliefs. There is no point me hiding myself from me. When I am trying to work out what to do for the best I also have to understand my motivations and the bias I am applying.

It’s very easy in a time of ‘me, me’ and Ego Mind to loose sight of other people. I know the temptations of making decisions coming only from my needs and not from what all of us need. If I drift off into that state I only have to look around at what people are mirroring back to me. Because they will be considering only themselves in any debate. My Guides say all Guides work with all of us to try to shift the ‘me, me’ as much as possible. They try to introduce empathy, authenticity and self-awareness. But, of course, not everyone is at the point of recognising themselves yet. I understand this. I know I didn’t want to look at my shadow side. Or acknowledge it’s power and influence on me.

Yet I am glad I did. I started a debate with myself once I looked inside. Because I wanted to act from a heart centred, unconditional love perspective. That’s hard. I know we are trained to limit our love for ourselves. And therefore for others. So I had a long, sometimes exhausting time debating with myself. But it was worth it. I know I work from the best bits of me. My choices may not suit others but I am in alignment with my principles. I do believe in authenticity, empathy and self-awareness. The actions I take are based on ‘First do no harm’ with the understanding that my definition of ‘harm’ may not fit someone else’s understanding.

It is their choice to join in debating a shared understanding between us. But if they don’t ask I don’t explain either.

I am very aware that I can’t please all of the people all of the time. I freely admit that I don’t try to please anyone. Except myself. Debating with my Guides I realised that trying to do the best thing as measured by other people was a thankless task. Everyone has a different view of what the best is. I don’t have to look far to see that acted out at local, national or global levels. There is so much debate about what is best. Yet no debate about the beliefs backing up the arguments. Or the self-awareness to admit a vested interest in one outcome or another. So people stay on the defensive. Or, worse still, launch into an attack as if that will gain more agreement.

This lack of authenticity in the debates we are having currently means we will still act from Ego. In other words, our actions will be driven by fear not kindness. Or a recognition of shared humanity. No wonder my Guides keep on at me to write and speak about unconditional love. That is the only way to navigate through all the debating. The only way for me and you to be sure that our actions do not create consequences we don’t want to have come back. That’s the secret the Guides know. When we send out fear responses all we get back is fear. I have had that return of energy. Now I work within myself to send out unconditional love.

My choices are grounded in tough love. Grown up love. Love that knows how we treat others will come back on us. I understand that people find it easier to say ‘with love’ than to actually follow through on doing with love. I let it be. The lesson being learned isn’t mine. It’s theirs. And I also remember that there are many, many strands to a debate. Many truths. Many opinions. I follow my heart on the spiritual path as that feels honest and  loving. I hope you can too.

Day 822 of my blogging challenge

Opening My heart To Let Love Flow

openingLove. I’m back to that word that seems to have a thousand meanings. Opening my eyes to how tricky it is to pin down a definition for this most powerful of human emotions. And the reason why I’ve done so many wrong-headed things in my life.

In my work I often talk about unconditional love. Yet I know I have been on a life long journey to understand where I am conditional with love. Even where I have mistaken other feelings for this very elusive emotion. Or when I have loved someone or thing more than myself. Yet I keep trying to ‘find’ love of one sort or another. And all the while my Ego Mind tries to mislead or distract me away from the very feeling I want to experience. Because that is the issue. Do I love myself enough? Am I opening my heart to myself and my own beauty? And in what way do I interpret the word love when I apply it to myself?

I realise that love for myself, opening my heart and being in the flow of love all require one key ingredient. It is that I have to trust myself. I have to allow myself the recognition that I am someone who is lovable. Yet with an Ego Mind that is always ready to pull me back, put me down or undermine my intentions trust can be so very difficult. It is within myself that I learn to interpret the meaning of love. But that means opening up to the part of me that I don’t love. The bit that I have learned, been conditioned to, taken on board from life’s experiences. Because not everyone I meet has seemed to fill my world with love. Bringing me reasons to distrust the very nature of love altogether.

Understanding the nature of disappointment, conditionality and restrictions in the flow of love is a way of opening up to more love.

As is my understanding that all of us are dealing with different interpretations of the word love. Interpretations that have arisen from what we have encountered from our selves and others. My journey into understanding love had been one of stripping back these layers within me. And re-engaging with my heart. Making it once more central to all I do. Reminding myself to stay open to the opportunities that love brings. Standing my ground in the flow inwards and outwards of this life enhancing energy. Letting love find me in very many different ways. And trusting my heart to circulate all of the love that flows to and from me.

This is a very important year. The Divine Feminine energy will be flowing powerfully through all of our lives. The Divine Mother will have our back, so to speak. It will be an exercise in tough love. Be ready to learn to trust and therefore love yourself unconditionally. And also be ready to learn to trust and love others unconditionally too. The energy of love is so much required to help us draw back from the self destructive urges of the Ego Mind. To release ourselves from the control exerted by fear and hate. Opening your heart, to yourself and to others, is the way forward. It is the way to manifest harmony and peace.

I understand you may struggle, like I do, with the meaning of unconditional love. Or struggle with how to live your life in the flow of unconditional love. However, keep trying. Remind yourself every day that you are loved. That whatever others think, say or do you are a person full of love. Trust in this truth and share it with the world in whatever way you can.

Day 794 of my blogging challenge

Puzzle It Out! Dreaming Messages Again

puzzleWhat a dream filled night! And day! Yes, I’ve been getting messages through my vivid dreams again. But, as usual, I’ve been left to puzzle the messages out. If only my Guides could make it super simple for me.

I love the way my guide team want to let me know what is happening. However they often have to work their way around my Ego Mind. It doesn’t like to let go of the control it thinks I have over my life. So sometimes I get a string of vivid dreams to get a message across to me. Yet I can also be left with a puzzle. Today I started a thread on my Facebook page because of last night’s dreams. It was interesting to see how many of us had the same themes popping up. It got me thinking about the Divine Feminine energy I have been receiving. And the task we all have to make a great change in the way this world operates.

The dreams had lots of vehicles in them. Houses and rooms. People who hadn’t been around for many years. Or who were already on the higher side. Even a baby or two. Healing and rebalancing also featured. I got a very clear feeling that a wave of justice was on it’s way in. That I would be helping people get turned around and stepping into their own spiritual mission once they had realigned themselves. Perhaps it was an example of our mass dream taking place on the Spirit side of life. Something the indigenous people of Australia talk about. I wondered if all of my ‘tribe’ were dreaming about these big themes because we had to work together to puzzle it out.

Certainly the dreams send a message of movement, or getting moving, new beginnings and a recognition of the Guides who are with us. Of the ties we make across time and outside of time. Because there are many layers to any dream I will, no doubt, keep returning to the puzzle I’ve been left. Or even dream more dreams with other bits of the whole. Is it time to go to sleep yet?

Day 789 of my blogging challenge

Measuring Progress: Remember The Good Stuff

MeasuringI’ve been thinking a lot today about the last five years. I suppose I’ve been measuring the effectiveness of what I’ve spent my time doing. Looking through the memories to see what  pings as something I’m happy to recall.

When I’m mentoring one of the things I like to do is make sure we can measure the progress someone is making. Because I know progress is something hard to see when I am in the middle of changes. So too for the mentees. If fact, it’s so easy to think or feel like you haven’t moved on at all. So closing the Centre, disposing of the material things associated with it, got me measuring what I had achieved. I started thinking about all the experiences I had whilst running it. And how I might decide if those experiences were worth it in some way. Then I found that I got focused on the things that hadn’t worked. Or been less than positive. Even disastrous. As if my Ego Mind wanted to present me with all the things that went wrong.

How interesting that I fell into that trap. I feel it’s one we all find hard to avoid. My mind seemed to have forgotten all the good stuff. All the thank you’s and well done’s that came my way. The success stories as people found a way out of the confusion in their lives. Measuring my life for the last five years by these standards makes for a a much better sense of progress than the things that didn’t work. I wondered if it was my tiny little streak of perfectionism jumping in again. I’ve reduced it’s influence quite a lot over the last five years. But perhaps I have more work to do on it. I suppose it could be my little desire to please others – rather than myself – making me feel a lack of progress. I’ve been working on that quality too. The last five years I’ve come a long way in knowing I have to please myself first. It could, of course, be the way I tend to let the judgements of others make me feel I haven’t done enough. Yet that tendency has almost disappeared too.

After I thought about it for a while I realised that a lot of things have changed for me. Measuring my progress means embracing that I do things my way much more. I trust my intuition to guide me and I stay in the flow of energy. Because I know that things will work well when I do. There is so much good stuff to remember. But most of all I can remember that I tried my best, did what I could and grew so much by having the Down 2 Earth Heart Centre.

Day 742 of my blogging challenge

Reflection, Retrograde, Refocus And Renew

reflectionIt’s time for reflection! Mercury is going retrograde again until 22nd December so expect any unfinished business to pop up again and again until you finish it.

There are times when I groan about Mercury going retrograde. I feel that communication is hard enough without adding in that subtle influence that makes me look again at everything I’ve said and done since the last time Mercury turned the other way round. The planet appears to be going backwards in the sky and that pushes me into going backwards too. Not something I want when I’m trying to stay focused on moving forward. And spending time in reflection can feel like a wasteful way to spend my time. After all I know better than I did then. So why do I have to look at everything again. Oh that wonderful Ego Mind. Keen to keep me in ignorance of the things within me that are actually holding me back.

After all, on reflection, I might decide that it’s ok to step further out of my comfort zone when I realise I’m not dreaming big enough. Something that terrifies my Ego Mind. It doesn’t want to loose control of keeping me safe. So perhaps I can welcome Mercury’s trip backwards. Because it can help me to understand where I am limiting myself. After all, I might find that I want to refocus on where I’m headed. Or how I’m going to travel my path. I might even decide to leap much further and more boldly ahead that before. So I appreciate the benefit of the next few weeks. I will do my best to work through the issues that arise. Knowing that I am being given an opportunity to start afresh. And with renewed energy and commitment.

Reflection is a positive asset. I know that when I pay attention to the unfinished, loose ends of my life I will learn something new once again. During this retrograde period I am going to be kind to myself, allowing the thinking through, so that I can renew my commitment to being the best possible me I can be. Is it time to find a quiet place and engage in your own reflection?

Day 738 of my blogging challenge