I would have liked to sleep in this morning. Instead I had readings to do, meditation to lead and a Drop In to run. Working for myself I fondly imagined I would be able to please myself about my day.
That is where I was wrong. Living an intuitive life means things are less predictable than I once imagined. Of course, as my own boss, I can set my own working hours. It’s just that sometimes I am drawn to say yes when perhaps I had intended to say no. I guess when I started out working publicly as a medium I assumed that there would be an even, steady flow of work. People who booked to see me would stick to their appointments. I would have certain days only when I was available. And I would have lots of time for the things I thought I would like to do.
I imagined predictable things would happen. Readings, church services, a bit of teaching and some healing. There would be a pattern and a flow so I would have a diary filled with organised days. Of course it has never worked like that. Not that I haven’t tried to make my days an organised dream. Or that part of me has been itching to colour code, block out and schedule everything neatly. As the years have clicked by each new diary has had planner and pages noted and marked. Events and workshops placed on dates where I am certain they will fit beautifully with everything else. Only to find six or eight weeks in the appointments and lists are a hotch potch of crossings out. All order thrown firmly out of the window.
I do it so often that redoing my diary is now predictable. Perhaps the only thing that is when I’m looking to the future.
For that’s another thing I’m often asked to do for people. They want me to predict for them without realising that not everything is set in stone. It’s predictable that if we always do what we have always done then we will always get what we alway got. The future is only available for me to read if the person concerned is willing to change course. Having something new happen relies on creating the energy and will to change the pattern we have now. So one of my biggest strides with my work and business was when I realised that old habits die hard. I had to learn to free myself up to the unpredictable nature of change.
My intuition always prompts me when change energy is on the way in. If I pay careful enough attention I can even predict what the changes are likely to be. Of course, I may resist the changes, especially if I have got too comfortable in my current pattern. Yet if I do follow what my intuition, or my heart, suggests I find myself in a better situation. I meet new and interesting people. There are fresh work opportunities. I have fun. Things change a bit and I hold onto the past less. Eventually something reminds me how much I have changed from the way I used to be. This is the process of evolution in action. My life is helping me to grow and thrive. I know it can feel strange or unsettled for a while but now I wouldn’t swap my intuitive life for predictability.
Day 347 of my blogging challenge.