Sometimes I wake up with word running around my head. Usually in the middle of the night. Often from the conversations I’ve been having with my Guides. One recent discussion was about kind thoughts. Because I have been working on forgiveness.
One of the hardest lessons I’ve had to take on board is to be kind to myself. I learned very early in life that I was expected to be kind to others. But I’m not sure that I ever balanced that out with the other half of the equation. That I also needed to give myself the same kindness. When I did start to recognise it was a balance I’m sure I got it wrong lots of times. Because I also needed to understand the nature of forgiveness. Being kind to people I liked was easy. As was me being kind to those who liked me. But what about all of the people I struggled to like? Or didn’t want to like? What about the people I though had done me wrong? How could I offer kindness to them?
When I started to talk to my Spirit Guides they were keen for me to understand how forgiveness, like love, had to be unconditional. If I wanted to be kind to myself and others I also had to be free to forgive myself for anything and everything. That way I would also be ready to forgive other people too. It brought up interesting ideas about guilt and blame. Two great inhibitors on any form of forgiveness. Working through these ideas and feelings was hard. Very hard. Until I started to send out kind thoughts to people. All sorts of people. Including myself. Recognising that we are all flawed. That sometimes we don’t do the best things for one another. Or to one another. Bit by bit I worked to send positive thoughts to people who were in my life. No matter what had passed between us. Or how I felt about that person.
The sending of kind thoughts allowed me to release myself from judgements. I could forgive myself for being less than perfect. And I could also forgive others for the same. Every time I get a negative reaction to someone, or myself, I remind myself to deal with it kindly. And to move on. There are more important things to learn about life. Especially about kindness and forgiveness.
Day 829 of my blogging challenge