Cliffs : Stepping off

EdgeCLogue

Cliffs are everywhere in our lives. Edges where we pause, hold back, run away from or peer fearfully over. The idea that we have to step forward into the unknown, to give away control, to hope we don’t go splat!

One of the hardest cliffs I had to step off (aside from becoming a parent) was to trust the connection to Spirit Beings. Aside from my natural tendency to doubt until I have evidence (my logical, analytical mind) there was another point of resistance. My background & my social conditioning both say that hearing, seeing & sensing Spirit is frightening, wrong and the way to end up mentally ill. So quite a leap of faith was required!

I still think about what the final push was. The Guide who worked with me first took his time to make himself know to me. He understood that I would be testing myself every step of the way. I was reluctant to accept that there was anything outside of me that could communicate but not have a physical presence. Of course I had been a self-directed student of past lives, religion and philosophy for most of my life. I had been heavily into science fiction so open to considering that reality was not as we though it was. My interests in astrology, dream interpretation, tarot, magic and esoteric traditions had lead me into fascinating experiences. Yet I was still standing on the edge. Perhaps there were other beings who could interact with me. How would I tell them apart from all the different parts of my psyche – my human soul, mind or spirit (add in the study of psychology as well)?

So did I fall or was I pushed. I certainly puzzled over the challenges to my early life beliefs. What I might once have taken for granted was slowly & steadily being turned upside down. I went back over my values & beliefs time and time again. Some changed easily and some stayed stuck for much longer. As I continued to acknowledge that I seemed to be getting information I couldn’t have possible known in any other way the sense of my Guide emerged. A personality was forming – different than my own, sometimes completely opposite from mine. Was it another aspect of me – a role I was testing out or a part of me I hadn’t explored yet? The personality seemed to come with its own back story. He could recall experiences that I certainly hadn’t had in this life. Was it my vivid imagination? There was a quality to these experiences, too much detail, that seemed to suggest they were ‘real’ memories. I admit to being intrigued. I wanted to know more, have more evidence, get more detail. My earlier objections faded away.

Then one day it was time for me to pass on publicly the information I was receiving. I suppose you could say I was already leaning over the edge of the cliff. Letting myself fall, feeling the gentle shove in my back. It was time to stand up & say what I was getting. My Guide made it possible for me to voice my first ever message for someone else. All else is about flying. I was so far outside of my original comfort zone, so far from the edge I had stood on for so long, that it seemed natural to embrace the experience. Yes, I still worries that I would crash and burn. Yes, there were still uncertainties. Yes, I still had a long way to go to being completely trusting. But I was flying.

Since that first step off the cliff I have been to the edge of and stepped off quite a few more. Surprisingly, or not, each time I have flown. Perhaps not for long. Perhaps in an odd direction. Perhaps too high for what I could cope with. Yet stepping off cliffs has becom my pattern. I know that I am guided – as each new Guide steps forward there is another cliff to face – and I know that any fall will never truly hurt me. I would go so far as to say stepping off cliffs has become my passion. I’m renewing my understanding of myself and life each moment that I take a leap of faith.

So, for me, the Energy Beings are as real as everything else I experience through my human life. They have a place in my life that is very important to me. They are one of the ways in which I grow and expand as a Spirit/Human. I’m sure they will push me off many more cliffs so I can expand my wings, feel the updraft and fly above and beyond. Is it time you spread your wings, allowed yourself to be pushed off the edge and took a fresh look at your life?

Day 77 of my blogging challenge.

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