I sat down to write this blog completely empty of inspiration. Feeling like I was in a flat curve. The kind of turn that creeps up on you unexpectedly. And then you realise the road is really turning upwards. So you have to steer carefully.
Mercury retrograde often feels like a flat curve to me. Because everything levels out. I feel like I’m at a halt. Or worse, sliding backwards. And I have no idea how I’m going to get moving forward again. It’s been one of those days. Listening to conversations all around me that echo old stuff. Watching people wander around unaware that they are throwing off angry, sad or fearful energy. Everyone stuck in their little world of negativity. That included me too for a short while. Having feelings is a human heritage. But sometimes I wish it was all love and light. When I also know that that is an unrealistic expectation. And the reality of the energy on the Earth makes me feel flat.
It’s at these points, when a bend in the road is coming up, that I have to jump in and take responsibility for my own energy. I am clearing a lot of the stuff that has held me back in the past. Waiting for the road to take me upwards. And sucked into an illusion that it isn’t. No wonder my past lives are haunting me too. Yet the road is curving around the next bend. Although I can’t see what is coming up after I turn the corner I know that there are opportunities for a different life experience. So long as I pay attention to how I am driving myself forward. As long as I keep the positive energy flowing. And my heart committed to exploring the next adventure. This may be a flat curve. I might be unable to work out what’s coming up. But I’m in charge of how it makes me feel. And what options I have.
Often it’s at this point that I recognise I’m moving up to a higher level of experiencing. All of my experiences have brought me to this flat bend so I can navigate it safely. And have a better future up ahead of me. When you get to the curve, whichever way it bends, rebalance and drive on. Drive onwards and upwards. A new beginning is waiting for you.
Sometimes my energy gets jumbled up. Especially when there is a lot of extra energy flying about. I can get so muddled I sort of forget which energy is actually me.
That used to happen a lot when I was learning to open up my intuitive abilities. Especially when the Energy Beings stepped in too. I found I was handling not only my energy and the energy of the physical people around me but the non-physical energies too. It made for a full head a lot of the time. Until I learned to narrow my focus and cut down the amount of energy I had in my aura. Closing energy off is as important as opening up otherwise the jumbled thoughts, impressions and feelings really get tangled. Like a mad plate of spaghetti with no end or beginning. It took me quite a while, with a lot of assistance from my Gatekeeper Guide, to get to the point where my head could handle all the energy signals. But that left me, for a time, confused, uncertain and full of doubt.
This jumbled stage is entirely normal. Only I didn’t know that back then. Because no one told me the connections would hit me all in one go. Once my ‘door’ was open wide enough. So I understand how much of a challenge it can be to sort it all out. I was reminded of that again today. A day where there was a lot of energy flowing around from other human beings. And where the Energy beings were also trying to attract my attention. I found myself muddled about what I was experiencing. And I needed to stop, pause, for a little to sort it all out. So that I could act from my own energy. Not from the prompting of other people’s energy. And I could establish a clear connection to my Guides. My work is dependent on that clear connection. Pausing was vital. Sorting out was a priority.
When you find your head is all jumbled up take a break. Step out of everything for a moment or two. Ask yourself ‘is this my feeling or thought?’ Also ‘is this someone else’s feeling or thought?’ Get your Guides to help you by asking them to point you in the right direction. And pay attention to your heart. What feels like it is you? And what doesn’t. Trust only what you feel is your thought or feeling. Then get on with doing what you have worked out is best for you.
There has been a lot of music today. Songs that have meaning for me. All the tunes that inspire and uplift me. And all of them containing messages for me from my Guides.
I love using my clairaudience. Very often when I am giving people messages their loved ones start to sing songs that have significance for the person here. Sometimes if I have a group of Spirit people they will break into a chorus of something that connects them back to the people left behind here. It’s a delight to pass these tunes on. Although when the get me singing a song the person having a reading might not quite appreciate my unique style of singing. I’m a bit like Pierce Brosnan in Mama Mia! But willing to give it a go. It’s just the voices in my head sound so much better at it than me. However, I also love getting my own messages through music. With or without the clairaudience. Sometimes my Guides pack my day with significant songs. Like today.
I woke from a rather strange dream of having a lion biting my head and another biting my feet. It left me wondering. And feeling a little bit flat. Because I couldn’t quite grasp what the point of the dream was meant to be. Every explanation I thought of seemed a bit wide fo the mark. I felt I was in need of a boost. Which came along very quickly this afternoon with several songs I listened to whilst at a cafe with my friend. All of the favourites my Guides use to reassure me. The ones that get me laughing at my illusions. Toe tapping numbers that make me feel life is ok. And heart warming words to lift my Spirit. I even ended the day watching Mama Mia! Here We Go Again. There is certainly a message for me in the title alone.
If you are having an off day try to notice the songs that pop into your head. Or that are playing somewhere around you. Like me you might find that your Guides are letting you know that, underneath it all, everything is going to be ok.
The New Moon energy is starting to build. So today I have been thinking about my bucket list. All of the things I would like to do before I die. As I sat with my pen and paper I suddenly thought about the Spirit Within. What has my Spirit been asking for?
Every New Moon I write down my wish list. All of the positive energy that I want to flow my way. The things I still want to see, do or achieve. Then I send out a request to the Universe so that all of these things can manifest. My usual list is quite practical. A newer car. The chance to travel to other countries. A night out with friends. More book sales. New people to mentor. As I composed my list today I thought about my ultimate bucket list. What do I still want in my life? And I heard a small voice inside. Not a Guide this time. Because the voice trying to come through was of my Spirit self. After all my Spirit remembers the blueprint. The reasons I made all theses choices and conditions about this particular time of existing.
It made me stop and think. What did I put on my bucket list when I was making my plan to come down to Earth? I can’t say I’ve ever thought about it that way before. I have relied on my Guides to lead, push, pull or drag me to the experiences I require to fulfil my blueprint. Though inside of me my Spirit has always wanted to do, achieve or choose certain things about my life. Perhaps that ultimate list includes the losses I’ve experienced? Or the joy of my creativity? Even the experience of overcoming fears? It’s odd to think of a higher self list that includes both pleasant and unpleasant events. Yet my Spirit also knows that I grow through both love and pain. And only the human side of me can experience pain.
I’m still thinking about that Spirit bucket list. Checking off in my head what I have experienced in my life so far. And wondering what else I might have put on the list. This is going to take a little time to understand. And to embrace all that my Spirit planned for me. So I will salute the New Moon energy as usual. And await the next experience that my Spirit Within requires.
Another countdown has started. Like the ending of my blogging challenge we are rushing towards another set of endings. These are related to the energy that we have been living in since 2012. Finally, we can begin to take our inner work out into the world!
Depending on what position you wish to take we have been or are entering the Age of Aquarius. This will be a time of advancement towards a new consciousness, an emphasis on Divine Feminine and great progress in our humanitarian efforts. I believe that we stepped into the Aquarian energy around 1800 and the events affecting humanity since then have all been driving us to recognise a higher human purpose. Since 2012 I am aware that we have been receiving waves of energy, like a clock ticking towards a countdown, to get us free from social and cultural conditioning that has held us firmly in the 3D material reality. For the last six years we have been facing our fears and addressing endings. Endings of old patterns of being so that we can be a human global community of Spirit.
Now another countdown is underway. This is the final Mercury retrograde to pull us away from the old patterns. And to remind us that what we cling to so hard is really a set of illusions. Because there has been a deep inner journey going on for everyone for the last six years. A chance to identify who and what we really are. With opportunities to change our values and beliefs to live in a more spirit based way. That process has bee challenging. Mainly because we are not used to looking into ourselves. However, what is now almost at the surface, for anyone who has done the inner work, is a new way of being. A sense of freedom. The liberation from restrictions that made us conform. And a deeply compassionate, ethical way of relating to others who share the world with us.
With the countdown ticking away in the background the next few weeks are about bringing out the true you. About being and living the changes you want to see in your bit of the world. The ending of an old life because there is a new way to be as a person, a member of a community or as part of the human race. High vibrational positive energy is on it’s way in to push us all forward. Make sure you are ready. Let go of the old you and step into your Spirit Within.
I guess most of us dreams of winning big. In a career, with money or in love. Then life comes along and throws our wins out of the window. We experience loss. And the constant struggle to feel like we have won.
I know that losing creates uncomfortable feelings. And all sorts of negative thoughts. Especially when I would prefer the world to be a place full of certainty. Definitely the certainty of winning big. Yet life is unpredictable. Even unfair. Sometimes it seems as if everything is running against me. Yet it can turn around in an instant. Suddenly things are as I wish them to be. All the risks I have taken are paying off. And I feel like I have won what I wanted or needed. A long time ago I asked my Guides why life was so inconsistent. They said to me that I was looking at things the wrong way round. And encouraged me to see the patterns which created apparent inconsistencies. Like my relationship with money. Or with love.
It got me thinking. Reflecting on the ways in which energy flowed through my life. Especially at those times when I felt like the world’s biggest loser. Because I wanted that winning feeling all of the time. After all, wasn’t that what some lucky people had? Until I finally recognised that winning and loosing are an illusion. Luck is all about placing myself in alignment with the positive energy flowing through my life. And stopping trying to chase down the things that aren’t meant for me yet. I did a lot of work to remove the distortion of money energy from my life. That was a big factor in my worry about uncertain futures. And I also did a major piece of work on loving myself more. So that I would feel that Lottery win energy about all sorts of things.
Today I was thinking once more about winning big. Realising that I do it every day. I spend time with people I care about. I am paid to do what I am passionate about. Abundance flows to satisfy my daily needs. I have won the joy of life. There is no uncertainty any more. Every day is a good day if I choose to see it that way. Embrace the feeling. It’s there for you too.
I have always had standards. A level of quality I like to apply to my work. Any work. All work. When I started to do readings it was no different to my other activities. I aimed high.
Of course when I start something new my standards might be lower than when I am more experienced at it. But I always like to work to the best of my ability. That has been a very positive approach to my mediumship. Quite early on my Guides and I started to discuss what makes a good reading. They had me visit many demonstrations of mediumship so I could listen to the messages. I have to say I pinched several ways of expressing myself from those dedicated mediums. And I also found myself considering what I would never want to say either. I also took the opportunity to have readings myself. To experience how it felt, and what I thought, as each person told me the information they got. Some were amazing. Others left quite a bit to be desired.
It all helped me to iron out my standards. So that I could improve the way I worked and ensure that people got an authentic, evidenced reading. That also made then feel they had been in contact with a loved one. That’s why I understand that everyone is on a learning curve. But also that the people giving readings must be very aware that they hold great power by the messages they give. In my view a reading has to be clear, understandable and positive. I ask my Guides and the Spirit visitors to explain things in an organised fashion. With respect to their own personalities. I ask for evidence before I go into the message. And when they tell me the message I also ask for things that are helpful to the person in front of me.
Vague warnings, doom and gloom, frightening pronouncements. My standards mean I stop the reading if any of those are brought to me.
After thousands of readings I understand that the Spirit people want to bring love and support. Even when the message might be difficult for the person to hear. Sometimes I get connections from people who the sitter didn’t love on this side of life. Or where an ending has been painful or traumatic. The Spirit people want to repair relationships. And bring some peace of mind to the person getting the reading. That’s why the doom and gloom stuff never features. They know only too well that life has it’s ups and downs. Their wish is to help us swim through the challenging tides of life. Not to pull us down into drowning.
So when you go for a reading think carefully. If a message is coming through that is upsetting or frightening it’s not your loved ones talking. The psychic or medium may be inexperienced. Or they may have plugged into low vibrational energy. Perhaps they have very low standards of what they will pass on. Or they are working with an ulterior motive. Stop the reading straight away. Explain that you are not satisfied with the message coming through. A medium or psychic who wants to offer quality readings will understand. They may rearrange the reading to another time and date if you wish. And they certainly won’t charge if you have only been with them five or ten minutes. Reputable people are like this.
Reputable people have high standards. Like me they understand why and how they work for the Spirit World. Be an educated sitter. Use a psychic or medium who is prepared to work to the best of their current ability. And isn’t afraid to say that they haven’t got a link. Or that they are having an off day. It’s your reading. Make sure you get the best one you can.
I’ve thought a lot today about unleashing power. And what happens when I stop holding myself back. Of course it’s another Mercury retrograde theme. Because there are times when I feel powerless.
Unleashing implies that I have somehow restricted my power. Held it back. There is a part of me that finds it hard to own my power. Mainly because of judgements about what power represents. And all those stories of power being used for bad or wrong purposes. The abuses of power. Yet when I consider that Mercury retrograde is all about illusions – we never go back, only forward – I also wonder what I am doing by leashing my power. It’s as if I can’t be my whole, authentic self unless I use what I have been given. Until I run into that something inside of me that fears my own power. Perhaps that is at the heart of things in turbulent times. When the energy of change is demanding that I do things I’m not sure I can do I trip myself up.
I feel as if I am being called on to act. By unleashing my inner power to be me I can make more sense of all the turbulent energy ‘out there’. However that means dealing with the turbulent energy within me. Dealing with the part of me that shrinks from acknowledging that I can take action. That I can affect my inner and outer worlds by what I choose to do. Understanding that I have to bring my abilities to bear on the situations I find myself in. Finally, that I can be responsible for myself and the way the changes turn out. I forget the power that taking responsibility for myself can give me. The fearful bit of me doesn’t think I can make wise choices. It wants to hand responsibility over to someone or something else.
Because turbulent energy means I have no, or very little, idea where I might end up. It makes me uncertain. Until I remember that I have the power to do whatever is best for me. I can choose. And I can use all of my inner resources to stay steady until the change has passed.
Sometimes it seems like I have taken a giant step backwards. When I’m pitting my heart against my head and getting stuck. No wonder I seem to procrastinate a lot!
In the battle between my intuition and my logic I often find myself feeling really, really frustrated. Especially when I feel I need to act. But I don’t know what action will be the best. Or right. It’s taken me a long time to recognise that I have a pattern of pitting my heart against my head. Of recognising that change is in the incoming energy but my Ego Mind is too busy rehearsing all of my fears about change. When, if I wait for the time to pass, all that needs to change will do so easily. My first lesson to myself was to learn to hold the opposing energies of my heart and my head. To keep calm and know that there would be a point when my head and heart agreed.
Over time I have stopped pitting one part of me against the other. I guess I have learned patience. And the wisdom to only take action when both my mind and heart agree. But I have also learned something else. Something I never used to consider. There is a third voice in the debate. My Spirit. The part of me that is eternal, recognises there is a blueprint and is happy to let extraordinary things happen to keep me on plan. Until I realised that my Spirit had a say, the trio had to be in agreement, I found my heart and mind reached agreement on things my Spirit would never want me to do. I’ve actually been down quite a few blind alleys because I have failed to recognise the prompts from my Spirit.
Now I know that I also have to avoid pitting my heart and mind against my Spirit. I take time every day or two to let myself be quiet. To sit and be still so that I can hear my own Spirit voice offering me support and advice. And I move forward only when I am sure that all three parts of me are happy with what has been decided. Are you struggling to change or adapt? Have you listened to your Spirit recently? Let it help you to work out the perfect way forward.
Nineteen days to go! I can feel the excitement building already. Soon I will have finished my blogging challenge. I set out to do thirty days. Then changed it to one thousand and one. And now I’m nearly finished.
That’s nearly three years of my life spent writing a blog a day. So many good things have come out of the self-discipline of sticking to the task I set myself. But now I feel excitement all over again. Yes I suppose I am wondering what it will feel like not to sit down and review my intuitive day. Certainly I will end an opportunity to channel in the guidance from the kind hearted Energy Beings who have helped me. Also it will feel strange not to be checking into my website so often. But I am freeing up creative space. Giving myself room for something new to come in. Letting the Universal energy manifest a fresh start for me. That really gets my attention.
I am excited about all sorts of new possibilities. The excitement is powering me forward even if I am feeling like things might be going backwards due to the Mercury retrograde influence. Today I have taken some opportunities to let that energy build. To let my mind leap into creative inspirations. And to explore all the strands of conversation that have carried the seeds off new energy. I’ve also been very aware of the Seventh Ray energy that is blasting into our world at the moment. St Germain has been colouring my world with violet to dissolve old stuff. Along with emerald green for higher heart healing. As my heart lifts my Spirit within is finally starting to sing.
I am on track. Exactly where I need to be. Doing what I planned to do. The excitement flowing through my aura like a warm and powerful tide. Extinguishing the fear of change. Removing the doubt. Inspiring me to hope. And, best of all, encouraging me to take the next big leap of faith. So I am sending you the energy of St Germain tonight. To help you get excited and empowered.